President Trump failed to win the Nobel Peace Prize this year.
Undaunted, he is working hard to set a Guinness World Record.
Trump, an immigrant to swampy Florida, may create a new category as he works his trade.
He even showed off his skills Thursday night when an NBC journalist questioned him on live tv. The "cognitively all there" president simply insisted he did not know the answer to the question lobbed his way.
Did you take a Covid-19 test before you appeared in-person to debate Joe Biden, your Democratic challenger? he was asked.
Trump didn't know the answer.
This response is consistent with how our president acts when inconvenient questions arise.
Why don't you denounce the racist David Duke?
Don't know him.
What about QAnon, an outfit the FBI warns is dangerous?
Don't know anything about them, although I've heard they say nice things about me.
Will you condemn the racist, violent Proud Boys?
Who? says the president of the Free World.
U.S. intelligence agencies insist Putin and Russia backed you in 2016 and continue to corrupt our electoral process. What do you say to that? he was asked at a joint press conference with Putin.
Putin denied the allegations strongly, and I don't know of any reason why Russia would do this.
Don't know, don't know, don't know.
You get the picture.
Born with an active imagination, I wonder whether Trump has a good reason for keeping quiet about a possible pre-debate Covid-19 test. Maybe he took a test, and it was positive, I speculate, which means he put his political opponent at risk of getting the potentially fatal disease.
More to the point, such novel behavior with the novel Coronavirus indicates Trump may have created a new way to defeat a presidential candidate; a candidate who leads him in the polls.
Here you go, Joe, let's see if you make it to Nov. 3, I imagine Trump thinking as he yelled at Biden and hectored him during the debate.
And reporters -- those "enemies of the state" who create "fake news" -- have deigned to ask the president what he thinks about reports that Putin sends his spies around the world to poison opponents.
Of course, Trump knows nothing about these reports, although he told a former Fox scold that America is known for killing off people we don't like.
Returning to earth, I'm beginning to think our president's favorite show years ago was Hogan's Heroes.
I say this because a recurring character on the show foreshadowed Trump's approach to transparency and honesty.
Consider this: The lovable overseer of Allied POW's, Sgt. Schultz, ducked and dodged responsibility by saying, "I know nothing."
This golden line from the golden 60's leads me to speculate that Trump practiced the Schultz line in his gold-plated mirror growing up.
Whether he did or not, fans and critics of the president ought to contact Guinness World Records to nominate Trump for the "I Know Nothing" category of governing.
This is one victory Trump will have earned.