Since the people in charge of McCain's campaign aren't ever going to release his medical records without a fight all the way up to the Supreme Court, investigative reporters like me are going to have to make do with other means of digging for the truth -- including a quick trip to Seattle Grace.
"What observations have you made that would help give the American public a better sense of McCain's state of health?" I would ask Dr. McDreamy. "American voters need to know this information because if by some miracle (and with a little help from Diebold) McCain actually did get inaugurated and then his health deteriorated while he was in office, then we'd be stuck with Sarah Palin." At the prospect of Palin becoming the next Miss America, I bet you anything that Dr. McDreamy would wince, shudder and tell all.
"I've observed McCain on television on several occasions and have come up with some tentative diagnoses," Dr. McDreamy might reply. "For instance, I've noted that he has trouble going up and down the stairs of planes. He doesn't seem to have much functional control over his legs and knees." Interesting.
"What about his history of skin cancer?"
"Again, it's hard to say without giving Mr. McCain a thorough exam." Okay. Yeah. Works for me. Let's go ahead and GIVE the dude a thorough exam. There is just too much at stake for American voters to not know the actual facts regarding McCain's state of health.
Can I have one too?
PS: I'll have to wait to schedule my appointment with Dr. McDreamy until I get back from Iran. I'm leaving tomorrow and won't be back until Halloween. So, John, please don't bomb bomb bomb Iran while I'm gone!