What me worry? I'm saved. /AP photo
No doubt, with electioneering growing uglier, more divisive,
and far more expensive, everyone longs for a more transparent, steam-lined
system. But for this notorious,
career demagogue, allegedly awash with ideas, no problem. Now, all praise Newt for his magic thinking, as straightforward as it is self-serving. First, declare yourself the best
candidate, thus owning the presumption you deserve to win. Second, like an instant lottery
winner, award yourself the GOP nod, then pre-emptively declare your own victorious ride into
the Oval Office. For Newt
the sociopath, the world need only create a modest new category,
the President-in-Waiting, like the Prince of Wales waiting for the inevitable succession.
Despite a crushing Florida primary loss, Newt scoffed at the defeat and the "blatantly dishonest" (thus temporary) winner-frontrunner. Then begins an epic rant, armed with a fistful of major reforms he'd enact hours after his presidential inauguration. Boundless, Gingrich's denial is beginning to give chutzpah, let alone grandiosity, a bad name. Cosmic inevitability trumps public opinion and elections: the anointed hero need only present himself, then remove Excalibur and accept the glory. Yessiree, lunacy reigns for this ridiculed fan of "lunar" colonies (yes, both from the same root).
Newt's litany begins with pre-inauguration demands that Congress do his bidding so he can instantly repeal Obama-care, Dodd-Frank and Sarbanes-Oxley bills. Waste not, want not: Newt's "goal is to have all three bills sitting there, waiting" so "the minute I am sworn in, I can sign all three and we're off to a pretty good opening morning." But wait, there's more, for rapid-fire executive orders are coming down the pike:
- to instruct the State Department that day to open the embassy in Jerusalem and recognize Israel [say what?];
- to reinstate Ronald Reagan's Mexico City policy, so no "U.S. money will go anywhere in the world to pay for abortion, period;" and
- to repeal "every anti-religious act of the Obama administration as of that moment."
The Certainty of the Deranged
And all this delivered with certitude, laced with Newt's sneering condescension, "All of this is going to happen about two hours after the inaugural address. OK? No point in hanging out and having fun . . . This is going to be a working presidency. I may not get in as much golf as Obama, but I'll get in a lot more job creation." Had enough? Not Newt. Next, he'll eviscerate all White House czars plus approve the Keystone pipeline. Hell, why not cut the federal budget by 20%, pay off the deficit, and bomb, bomb, bomb Iran?
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