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David's Flying Shoes v. Goliath's Bloody Ruse

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David's Flying Shoes v. Goliath's Bloody Ruse

Edip Yuksel


"As Goliath, the emperor of the world's only super power, moved closer to thank his men for their joint effort to destroy, murder, torture, rape, and plunder, David ran quickly toward the news conference to meet him. Reaching to his feet and taking out a shoe, he hurled it and struck Goliath on his charisma. Then he hurled the second shoe. The shoes broke the window-dressing, exposed the facade. The world watched Goliath transforming to a cobbler, uttering the words: "the shoe size was ten." (Modern adaptation of 1 Samuel 17:48-49 by Edip Yuksel)


Shoe (n): A durable covering for the human foot, made of leather or similar material with a rigid sole and heel, usually extending no higher than the ankle, occasionally thrown to liars, murderers, torturers, crusaders and naked emperors.


After skillfully ducking and dodging the two shoes hurled at his face at his final press conference in Baghdad, our dodger and ducker-in-chief calmly reported the size of the famous shoes. "It was a size 10 shoe" reported Bush from Baghdad. As the shoes missed their physical target, their target too missed the message of the Iraqi people. His report about the size of the shoe was another example of attempting to dodge the reality with distraction. But he could do worse; he could put the shoes on and thank the reporter for the Christmas gift! Like all self-righteous naked emperors, he and his entourage have been aloof to the pain of millions of people suffering directly or indirectly from the USA-Inc's policies of occupations, covert operations and supporting puppet dictators around the world. A pair of an unknown reporter's shoes became a symbolic repudiation of the super bully's hypocrisy and bloodshed.


I am surprised that the media did not check the veracity of the 43rd President's report about the shoes hurled at him by the Iraqi reporter. Was the shoe size really 10? I doubt it. First, in that part of the world it should be something like 40 plus. Furthermore, there is a big chance that the male reporter's shoe size was bigger, since Iraqis are not Chinese. The world knows by now that Bush, an end-time evangelist and as a recovering alcoholic, has multiple problems with truth and facts. Let's be fair; he did utter a few truthful statements such as, "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." Some of his previous reports and assessments will be remembered as examples of delusional, deceptive or amusing statements:


Saddam has a weapon of mass destruction.

Mission Accomplished!

Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job!

A signed peace treaty by the time I leave office.


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EDIP YUKSEL, J.D. is a progressive American-Turkish-Kurdish author/philosopher/lawyer/activist (too many hyphens and slashes, I know). His recent English books "Quran: a Reformist Translation", "Manifesto for Islamic Reform", and "NINETEEN: God's (more...)
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