"The wonderment of gracious inevitability," Tetanus Frank dropped this phrase in conversation at every opportunity. Most folks were too busy puzzling over his name to give it much thought. His mother named him Tetanus. His father loved his mother desperately and went along with it.
His Mother cut her thigh on rusty barbed wire when she was pregnant with Tetanus. That evening she imagined her jaw to be aching. She demanded that her husband take her to the emergency room to get a tetanus shot. When Tetanus was born, absolutely robust and perfectly healthy, she knew it was because of the providential emergency room visit: hence "Tetanus."
Tetanus suffered much throughout life, but he wore it like really good cinema. After every bout of personal trauma and decay a new day would dawn -- miraculously festooned in hope and promise. Like a carnival barker barking out the show that was his life, he irrepressibly climbed Candide's ladder and exclaimed to all that would hear, " Take heart my friends, today may seem dark and carrying foul inclinations, it will pass, it always does, a new dawn will rise, bright, with the wonderment of gracious inevitability..." From "Candide's Ladder" by Franklin Cincinnatus