(Article changed on December 1, 2013 at 12:31)
Riding his dramatic Iranian breakthrough, President Obama aims to re-ignite his faltering presidency with a Christmas miracle. Interrupting the White House press briefing, Mr. Obama brashly challenged rightwing nullification, calling for "an urgent summit to resolve the most serious and enduring threat to American prosperity: Tea Party Republicans."
Mindful of past appeasement, Mr. Obama was resolute, like a war-president in the fight of his life: "The Tea Party may not yet boast nuclear centrifuges. But are its endlessly spinning subterfuges any less perilous, any less in urgent need of exposure? My pledge against a nuclear Iran goes double for a terrorist group mounting a jihad towards a functioning American government, our integrity and future. The last two years prove domestic combatants don't need nukes to terrorize. I have no choice but use any means at my disposal to insure our security. So, I say: either we talk now or we talk later. Nothing, even drones, are off the table. "
Discarding the gentleman's code that sabotaged his first term, the president did not back off comparing Tea Party with Iranian duplicity: "At the end of the day, what is the great difference between calculated deception by Iran, with rather limited power or intention to injure us, vs. the calculated deception by homemade upstarts with far more leverage to do permanent institutional damage? I can't help but recall the best thing that ever popped out of John Kerry's mouth, his '04 campaign aside, 'This is the crookedest, lyingest bunch I have ever seen.' Would I deserve that notorious Nobel Peace Prize if I damped down foreign wars but let internal wars against America rage on?"
Targeting GOP sabotage of his presidency, Mr. Obama was unstoppable: "Time to admit frankly we're stuck with an undeclared House impeachment. Worse still, I was convicted by one party without the opportunity to defend myself, and we all know how that offends Constitutional protections. Look, having started to corral Iran's nukes, why not reign in Tea Party gridlock that hurts everyone? Maybe 'wild and crazy' fit the '12 GOP primary but how much of the politics of fake umbrage can this nation tolerate? If the right wants politics as warfare, let us force the issue and show what majority rule means. Our future, if not that of civilization, depends on the outcome."
The Outrage of Murdoch Minor
In a flash, FOX News' Murdoch Minor leapt his feet, outraged that any president dare call Yankee patriots "outsiders," let alone make them worse players than "Iranian madmen." Patiently, Mr. Obama said House radicals weren't "outsiders in the space alien sense, but where's the human compassion in kicking fellow citizens who are down? That corrodes national unity, just like Romney's dismissal of the 47%. Except now it's closer to 67%. GOP obsession with cutting taxes and Food Stamps, or demonizing basic support services, makes America look unfeeling, like officials are outsiders looking in. I am hardly alone in judging that anti-government nullifiers pose the greatest threat to the American way of life."
"Stunned into silence" captures the impact on hardened journalists. One staunch liberal had to be helped back onto his chair, slack-jawed. A brave voice broke the silence, "but, Mr. President, why now? Isn't gridlock unfixable?" "Well, if we can make peace with fearsome Iran," he asked, "why not with fearsome Republicans? Just like corporations, my friend, they are people too, and many still have souls. If we can break bread with far-off, angry religious ideologues, why not hometown, angry political ideologues? I admit an epiphany: what do we have to lose, can this stalemate get staler?"