That's how I knew, wheNever rejected,
it was my own surfaces
that had failed."
That's three times in a four-page poem, you mention "superficial"!
Well, most sensitive people have dark moods and various occasions to doubt their own sincerity! Fortunately, these moods and doubts and implacable regrets are balanced by the scrutinies of age, wisdom extracted from failures:
"but when I bathe naked and alone each morning,
behind the navy blue shower curtain, imprinted with gold
figures of the zodiac, I look
at my old body
and I know that all my youthful
cover me, clothe me with age's
cobwebbed skin, my belly swollen as if
I were illicitly pregnant,
and the sight of my own nakedness strips me