"My name is Bill M., and I'm an Obamaholic."
Yeah, I know the AA founder guy was Bill W., not Bill M., but this topsy-turvy political world we're living in can easily spin your head and make you see W's as M's. Or rather, the behavior of Bill McKibben, 350.org, and their associated anti-pipeline groups toward Obama can make you wonder if they've been hitting the bottle, huffing dilbit, or mainlining other drugs that require serious interventions.
Of course we know that Obama himself, particularly for those genetically lumpen liberal, is a dangerous controlled substance that can seriously distort perceptions. Like perceiving Bush's "war on terror" (and accompanying police state)--as long as we simply avoid the phrase--as a good thing. Having strong progressive genes (and therefore a natural immunity to the Obama drug), I like to use the phrase "war on terror" a lot, knowing that although it can produce painful flashbulb memories, such moments of distressing "shock and awe" are usually the price reality demands to reassert itself in the Obamaholic. See, as the founder of the True Blue Democrats progressive revolt movement, I'm rather a specialist in Obama interventions. No, not the AFRICOM ones--but the kind that actually produce a cure.
But Bill M., I'll admit, is a rather advanced case, one that may well defy my specialist's ability to help. For he's already repeatedly shown a form of masochism, popularly enshrined in the cartoon of Charlie Brown facing Lucy and the football, that's a telltale sign of advanced Obamaholism. Just as Charlie never seems to grasp that the only way to get better results is for LUCY herself to become target of his kicks, Bill M. goes back to rally after rally, pathetically displaying Obama's campaign O in his NOXL Pipeline signs, as if weren't pellucid truth for us the sober that Obama's O means he's giving you zero, zilch, zip, diddly squat, and nada. And as if tar sands head honchos Transcanada, whose lobbyists previously worked on the Hillary Clinton and John Kerry campaigns, weren't already recruiting local cops to spend their off-duty hours as hired muscle arresting--and probably clubbing, and possibly sending off to FEMA internment camps--Bill M. and his civilly disobedient ilk when they try to interfere with the pipeline. All under Obama's benevolent, condoning, climate-destroying smile.
See, even the sainted Gandhi, despite our pop-culture caricature, was a tough-minded, cagy sort who saw civil disobedience as a strong-arming political tool and not an adventure in masochism. I seriously doubt he, in our circumstances, would have refused the backup political muscle offered by a movement like True Blue Democrats--willing to bolt from the Democratic Party en masse if Obama approves the pipeline. Sure, with our current numbers, that's rather a lameass threat. But if we suddenly acquired as supporters all the McKibben-associated folks opposing the pipeline and registered as Democrats, our numbers would scarcely look lame. Perhaps not enough to stop the pipeline, but pretty impressive political cover for direct-action folks impeding it. For his likely treatment of you as terrorists, we'd be glad to return the favor by declaring you moral heroes and branding him a climate-destroying fascist.
But instead you keep running up, hoping this time he'll accommodate your eager foot with its well-earned dosage of football. A different sort of dosage is in question here, and multitudes before you have OD'ed on Obama's "hope."
It's high time you "kicked" the Obama habit. See the True Blue Democrats Facebook page at www.facebook.com/TrueBlueDemocratsAProgressiveRevolt for more details.