I'm kidding, Michael. First off, it was my Dad that sent Terri to help the religious right.
Personally I would have sent Michael Jackson. But once again, the Democrats are lying to you. And they are not in power, so they are Thous and can't lie. Dad did not send Terri to help them on the abortion issue or gay judges, or whatever their cause is this week.
He sent Terri to help distract the public from what is really happening. You can only use Iraq for so long. At some point people would have noticed and been pissed. So Terri was sent to distract the brainwashed masses.
Michael: So I do the right thing, and for this I am labled a murderer.
JC: Don't sweat it. You are just taking one for the team. I did and look where it got me. Someday you may have a radio show.
To my followers I say, don't hurt Michael. He just erred on the side of common sense. Just keep using him.
And now our next caller is Jan from St. Louis. I believe he was the Patron Saint of Beer. What can I do you out of, Jan?
Jan: Hi Jesus. I loved you in The Passion of the Christ.
JC: Yes, wonderful movie, I forgot how much I suffered - thanks, Mel. I thought people would appreciate the suffering caused by a Crown of Thorns without Mel Gibson showing it to them, but oh well. On the bright side, it kept Mel from making another Lethal Weapon movie. One more and Satan would have cashed in on another celebrity.
Jan: Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
JC: You sure have, I'm the Son, not the Father. We'll just edit that out for you and he won't think you took his name in vain. Now, what was your sin?
Jan: I saw Fahrenheit 911.
JC: Jan, thinking is not a sin. That won't happen till Jenna Bush becomes President.
Jan: Phew, thank God, I mean Jesus. Oh damn. My question for you, Jesus. Which is the one true religion?
JC: Ouch, I kinda wish you would have saved that one for ratings week. What is it with all these hard questions. Doesn't anyone have a question about carpentry?
OK, Jan, you want to know, I'll give to straight. The one true religion is Islam. Just kidding. Boy, I bet Bush just chocked on a pretzel when I said that.
Seriously, I guess for home court advantage I should go with the home team, the Jews.
But they don't even reconize me, so screw 'em. Catholics, they are the most fun, no doubt about it. If I had to turn water into wine for them, I would have had to drain Lake Michigan.
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Rob Kall is an award winning journalist, inventor, software architect,
connector and visionary. His work and his writing have been featured in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, CNN, ABC, the HuffingtonPost, Success, Discover and other media.
Check out his platform at RobKall.com
He is the author of The Bottom-up Revolution; Mastering the Emerging World of Connectivity
He's given talks and workshops to Fortune
500 execs and national medical and psychological organizations, and pioneered
first-of-their-kind conferences in Positive Psychology, Brain Science and
Story. He hosts some of the world's smartest, most interesting and powerful
people on his Bottom Up Radio Show,
and founded and publishes one of the top Google- ranked progressive news and
opinion sites, OpEdNews.com
more detailed bio:
Rob Kall has spent his adult life as an awakener and empowerer-- first in the field of biofeedback, inventing products, developing software and a music recording label, MuPsych, within the company he founded in 1978-- Futurehealth, and founding, organizing and running 3 conferences: Winter Brain, on Neurofeedback and consciousness, Optimal Functioning and Positive Psychology (a pioneer in the field of Positive Psychology, first presenting workshops on it in 1985) and Storycon Summit Meeting on the Art Science and Application of Story-- each the first of their kind. Then, when he found the process of raising people's consciousness and empowering them to take more control of their lives one person at a time was too slow, he founded Opednews.com-- which has been the top search result on Google for the terms liberal news and progressive opinion for several years. Rob began his Bottom-up Radio show, broadcast on WNJC 1360 AM to Metro Philly, also available on iTunes, covering the transition of our culture, business and world from predominantly Top-down (hierarchical, centralized, authoritarian, patriarchal, big) to bottom-up (egalitarian, local, interdependent, grassroots, archetypal feminine and small.) Recent long-term projects include a book, Bottom-up-- The Connection Revolution, (more...)
