"What did you cut?"
"First thing we did was order our classroom supplies from China. That saved us over 50 percent. Got a great deal on ugly desk-chairs."
"You obviously don't understand the concept of "Buy American'," I suggested.
"Not true, Ink Breath. We get our school uniforms from Wal-Mart. An all-American company."
"You are aware," I pointed out, "that most of the clothing in Big Box stores is made by exploited children and their impoverished parents in Third World Countries."
"Exactly!" beamed Marshbaum. "Cheaper that way. Besides, we use the labels to teach about world geography. That's a two-fer!"
"How else are you re-defining education?" I asked, knowing Marshbaum wouldn't disappoint me.
"Downsized the faculty. All those rich college graduates were hurting our bottom line. Hated to downsize Greenblatt, though. Thirty years on the job. Twice recognized as the state's best history teacher"
"You fired a tenured history teacher?"
"Had to. He was at the top of the salary schedule. Besides, he was teaching about the rise of the middle class and how unions helped get better wages and benefits for the masses. That's just downright unpatriotic. He refused to be a team player."
"What you did is probably illegal!" I said.
"We're a corporation," said Marshbaum smugly. "We can do anything we want. We'll be dumping math next."
"That's absurd! Of the industrialized nations, the U.S. is already near the bottom in math and science."
"No one gives a rotten apple's core about when trains at different speeds leave their stations and pass each other in Wichita."
"So you don't have any faculty?" I asked incredulously.
"Don't be ridiculous. We outsourced our teaching. There's Bierschmaltz in Austria and Wang Lin in Laos and--"