Who is more aware of the telecommute travesty: Bosses who telecommuters "report" to? (Right) Bathrobe wearing 42-year-olds with a cell in one hand and strained apricots for Zachary in the other...telecommuting? Or those of us on the subway with our coffee, lunch and work from last night--hello--trying to get to our cube by eight?
4) Retail Emcees
You hear it all the time: "On your left, you'll see our new beach towel collection"--retail trainees on the public address system who think they are airline pilots. They always add, "At this time we'd like to call your attention to the tube socks" and conclude with "and once again we'd like to thank you for shopping at Macy's."
5) Personal anything
What exactly does the word "personal" add to computer, trainer, banker, adviser, diet plan, identification number or debt consultant except dollars? Personal as opposed to what? Having to crowd around one newspaper posted in Red Square? No one feels compelled to say personal toothbrush.
6) Retail Deejays
Public address systems which also play music let managers step on a song you like at the same time they humiliate employees. "Attention sales associates!" (the lower the pay, the higher the use of "associates.") Your six minute break is up. Please return to the sales floor. Remember to pick up surrounding litter as you leave the break room."
7) Duckin' and Divin' Annual Reports
The worse the year, the wordier the annual report. Instead of saying we're major down again this year it's "In light of the scheduled spinoff of the disappointing biotech division and reengineering of the global sales network, pretax earning shortfalls are roughly equal to those seen in 2008* when annualized, weighted by country and indexed to inflation." (*when most of you sold)
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