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OpEdNews Op Eds    H2'ed 3/27/09

Insults by the Red Beaver: April Fool's Day Coming

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Dick; Cuthroat,  rather! And stop touching my leg.

5. Chicken Corps

The NAIS bill has a provision for the National Chicken Corps, endorsed by Barack Obama. Those will be  specially trained roosters who will  meet the new transport of chickens and deliver them to slaughter in an organized fashion while giving advise on how to get rid of unwanted feathers on the way.   The roosters will be specially trained by the humans who served in the same capacity  before.

7. Buttons

Hillary Clinton had delivered a  red button to the President of Mexico Mr. Calderon. It is called a Zachary Taylor button and refers to the everlasting desire of the US to help Mexico again the same way it helped before.

8. New Viagra Commercial

It sites Benjamin Button when he is about 1 year old oggling little girls from the window. The heading states:

- Why wait. Take Viagra and you can have them all now.

Tilda Svinton and Kate Blanchett are filing a protest.

9. Disarming

The US had offered Russia a mutual  nuclear disarmament:

- You, Russians   will disarm your nuclear arsenal while we in the US will disarm our nucelar one.

To which Russians responded:

- Sure, come after the rain on Thursday.

After  a month of deciphering  CIA figured out that it meant, ' Come when pigs fly.'

10. Highest Authorities

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The writer is 57 years old, semi- retired engineer, PhD, PE, CEM. I write fiction on a regular basis and I am also 10 years on OEN.

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