Tom DeLay- see Tom DeLay's Hard Drive, Sam Tanehaus, July, 2004 (Vanity Fair)- There is virtually no data available to confirm that DeLay is actually human. A really durable, sociopathic specimen, he seems to be half dragon and half horse (obviously the back half). DeLay and fellow "Ratf**ker"Karl Rove (see Ratf**ked: The True Story Behind the Secret Plan to Steal American Democracy, David Daley, 2016), Karl are the pioneers of modern gerrymandering technology, the creation of artificial voting districts designed to win a majority of House congressional seats with only a minority of votes. In addition to this, DeLay is responsible for hundreds of billions of dollars in overpayments by Part D of Medicare. With the help of fellow Texas congressman, Billy Tauzin, in 2003 he criminally extorted enough votes from House and Senate members to pass a reconciliation bill depriving seniors of the right to negotiate fair prices for pharmaceuticals. He was eventually convicted of accepting illicit campaign donations but the conviction was later reversed on appeal. Meanwhile, the Justice Department lost interest and never did indict him for illicit dealings with the infamous Jack Abramoff involving fraudulent labor practices in the Marianas. To this day he claims that we are better off without any national healthcare plan, that things were fine in the old days when he still had his hand in the till and hundreds of thousands of his victims were going bankrupt due to catastrophic medical bills.
Billy Tauzin- see article: The Legacy of Billy Tauzin, Paul Blumenthal, Feb. 12, 2010- I don't really know if Tauzin qualifies as a "swamp creature." It depends into which category one places a "bacterium." I guess we ought to call him a "micro-swamp organism." Half of the hundreds of billions in overpayments due to Medicare Part D are courtesy of Tauzin, who, while arranging for the pharmaceutical lobby to finish writing the fraudulent Part D bill, was also negotiating his contract to become the next president of the lobby. The U.S. Justice Cartel never bothered to prosecute Tauzin for Honest Service violations or the lobby for bribery.
Bill and Hillary Clinton- To be fair, other Democratic swamp creatures have been known to pollute the Washington swamp, but only the Clintons can compare in intellect, talent, and elusiveness to the likes of Karl Rove, Tom Delay or Ken Blackwell. While Bill, who, despite so many of his accusers meeting coincidentally untimely ends, despite a past strewn with who knows how many women he has abused and demeaned, most paid off or coerced to drop charges against him, and having expedited generous "gifts" of our high technology to the Chinese, continues to wreak havoc on both parties qualifies as some creature from the deep lagoon, Hillary's "sins" hardly rate a passing grade on the swamp creature scale, maybe a "C" at most. That is, compared to the menagerie above. The Clinton Foundation is currently under investigation for influence peddling and misuse of donations and in the final analysis will be the true measure of the extent to which both of its founders have polluted the Washington swamp.
I've saved perhaps the slimiest creature in the Washington sewage system for last because he, like a spoiled brat or a cute pet, has always been protected by his colleagues and virtually all the major segments of government. Clarence Thomas skated past a corrupt Senate committee investigation, open Senate hearings, and a Senate vote despite extensive testimony alleging his repeated sexual misconduct against his assistant. Not only were charges purposely ignored, but a deliberate attempt was made by Senate members to slander his accuser.
Lacking the intellectual capacity to legitimately sit on the Supreme Court, Thomas seldom seems to make cogent legal decisions and seems generally unable to author meaningful opinions of his own. His diminished capacity is evident in the fact that while his wife is a Republican lobbyist receiving hundreds of thousands of dollars lobbying for issues on which her husband rules, Thomas can see no reason why he should recuse himself on these issues, nor did he find it necessary to even declare to the Court the illicit income he had received through his wife's efforts. His clear incompetence as well as his violation of the Honest Services Statute has consistently been ignored by the Republican as well as Democratic House swamp organism leadership as well as the U.S. Justice Cartel and four presidents. His continued dishonesty does not exactly lend credence to his original denials of sexual misconduct during his Senate hearings. His continued presence on the Supreme Court and the absence of indictment or impeachment proceedings against him or even a threat of disbarment attest not only to Thomas's actual phylum, genus and species, but to the true depth of bipartisan depravity that exists in the Washington swamp.
To be continued... Too many creatures and too many questions, for example:
-Steve Bannon- Has he been in Washington pond scum long enough to consider it as home?
-Should "W" supplant Clarence Thomas as the slimiest of the swamp creatures?
-Where does Dick Cheney rank?
-Considering Barack Obama's protection of his friend "W's" sadistic "Justice" Department policies and his appointment of Eric Holder as AG, where does he rank on the swamp scale?
-Many other candidates are eligible for membership in the "Swamp Club," and any suggestions , along with suitable resumes are certainly welcome!
Allen Finkelstein, 3/29/17
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