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Garrison Keillor -- The vast left-wing conspiracy against me

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opednews.com Headlined to H4 3/9/17

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From flickr.com: Joe Biden - Caricature {MID-70389}
Joe Biden - Caricature
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Joe Biden is following me. I go to lunch at Mickey’s Diner and he’s sitting two stools away, wearing a stocking cap and a fake mustache with a fake nose and glasses but he says, “Hey, how’s it going, fella?” He is conducting a destabilization campaign against me, putting chemicals in my food that make me behave erratically. Why? Because he and his secret cabal are terrified of what I represent. Biden is sitting and looking at me as I write this and he is reading these words in the reflection off my glasses. My coffee tastes funny. I hear a high-pitched humming sound. I feel insects crawling up my leg. This may be my last message for a while. 
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Sheila Samples is an Oklahoma writer and a former civilian US Army Public Information Officer. She is a Managing Editor for OpEd News, and a regular contributor for a variety of Internet sites.

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