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The True Origin of World War II Revealed

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Churchill paused to allow the Royal Court Historian to soak up the import of what he had said and to tilt his head and drain his ear. Having accomplished both, Trumpleflush turned to face Churchill.

"Sir, if I understand all you have disclosed correctly, then in essence what you are saying is that one, the invasion of Poland was not the primary reason for going to war..." Churchill nodded, "...and two, once Hitler realized that the acquittal of the Felluchis alone would be enough cause for the English to declare war..."

As Trumpleflush paused -- for what he was about to assert was almost unthinkable and nearly impossible to say -- Churchill encouraged him, "Yes, go on, H. R., you're getting there."

"...then since war was inevitable, he, Hitler, had nothing to lose and might as well go ahead and attack Poland."


"So..." Trumpleflush stared directly into Churchill's eyes, " could further deduce that King George and Lord Rothschild provoked Hitler to invade Poland..." Churchill nodded as Trumpleflush began putting it all together, "...and the horrors which ensued, the terrible conflict, the loss of life, the destruction of Europe, and all the other dire consequences, can be traced back to one night of passionate ardor between Queen Victoria and the richest man in England and..."

"Go on, Trumpleflush, you've got it in your sights now."

"...the insidious salacious effects of... hickleberry root."

"Bravo, Trumpleflush!" Sir Winston applauded and laughed gaily, "Bravo and jolly well done. I knew you would get it on your own if I just provided you with a few pertinent facts."

Trumpleflush was stunned senseless. All he could do was to mutter over and over again, "Hickleberry root ... hickleberry root ... hickleberry root ..."

"Hickleberry root, indeed. And now you know why hickleberry root has been banned in Britain since 1896."

Both men sat in silence contemplating the true origins of World War II, which the general public would never be allowed to know.

"Sir Winston," Trumpleflush confessed, "I regret to say this, but it appears I can no longer hold back the whimpering and whining and so I fear I must leave you forthwith. Besides, my face is peeling off in great garish strips."

As Trumpleflush stood to leave and seek medical care, Sir Winston winked at him.

"You know, Trumpleflush, I have a private supply of hickleberry root if you would like to indulge in some while I invite the chambermaid in."

Stunned by this proposal, Trumpleflush nonetheless maintained his equanimity.

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Leni Matlin was born in NYC and attended Brooklyn College before moving to California in his twenties. For the better part of his adult life, he has worked as a musician (keyboards / vocals) and played in more bands then he can remember, while (more...)
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Why was Yew Flung Dung beheaded after the ceremony... by Don Caldarazzo on Tuesday, Sep 4, 2012 at 11:01:36 AM
Hilarious, BTW. ; )... by Don Caldarazzo on Tuesday, Sep 4, 2012 at 11:15:48 AM
Fabulous! The best jocularity about Bullshit Baffl... by Derick West on Tuesday, Sep 4, 2012 at 1:49:26 PM