OpEdNews Op Eds

Black Leaders...You're Fired !

By (about the author)     Permalink       (Page 1 of 1 pages)
Related Topic(s): ; ; , Add Tags Add to My Group(s)

View Ratings | Rate It

opednews.com

Dear Black Leader,


As the unofficial self- appointed representative of the people whom you are supposed to work for, I have a bit of bad news as of MLK Day Day 2008....You're Fired!!!

It's not that we don't appreciate your hard work and dedication in fighting for our civil rights and everything. We know your bio, which you always share with us anytime we ask you what have you done for us, lately. We know about the marches, the demonstrations, the police dogs and the jail stays. But that history is lost on this generation. They are desensitized to the "going to jail thing." My cousin Clyde, the Klepto can do a 10 year bid standing on one hand. As far as the police dogs, Lil Tyrone has to deal with stray pitbulls everyday coming home from school. So the tales from the past just don't move black folks like they used to.

Accounting is concerned about the expense account that you've been runnin' up. They say that you have been abusing the company's Bank of Harlem Black Card. Is it really necessary to wear $2000 Brooks Brothers suits and $1500 Itallian leather shoes, everyday while the people you work for get their clothes from WalMart and Pick and Pay? (Work rule # 1, never out dress the boss.) And how about the first class airline tickets and the 5 star hotels? Also, the board of directors thinks that the $5000 honorarium that you charge historically Black colleges for 45 minutes of your wisdom is a little excessive. Especially when you are going to ask the strugglin' college kids to break you off $28.99 for your latest hardback after the lecture?

My "peeps" in the street are also tired of seeing you on C-Span more than they see you in tha hood, homie. They want you to step your rap game up and come with something a little fresher than a remixed "I Have a Dream" speech, every year. At least Jay Z and his crew can bust a funky freestyle off the top of their heads. And stop criticizing their spinning rims and platinum teeth when you are bling blingin' more than they are. And for the record, they said that they ain't gonna stop using the "n" word as long as you keep referring to Black folks as "minorities" and"colored people." The Boys in the Hood want a chance to shine on the cover of Ebony and on the radio, too. My boy, Tre said that he was in the newspaper one time and his mother said that he looked real good dunkin' the basketball in the Cross City Championship of '95. He once dropped some serious info after the Jena 6 March in the middle of Mr Luther's Barber Shop and got a standing ovation and a free hair cut! Brotha's got some real talk for the people but NPR won't interview him , though.

The interns who have been runnin' around getting your coffee and filing your papers for the last 20 years are getting tired of being passed over for promotions. Word around the break room is that they are planning a hostile takeover if changes aren't made soon.

We tried to get your pension straight, but funny thing, no one in human resources remembers hiring you. It must have happened during the race riots of '69 when the brothas were handlin' their business in the streets. When the smoke cleared all the rest of the brothas were doing long prison sentences but you were at the front of the line to be the first black  to integrate Whiteman and Liverpool Inc.

To find a suitable replacement we have decided to launch our own reality show "America's Next Black Leader" and we will be going through hoods across America with a camcorder to see who is actually out there feeding the people, fighting the power and doing all of the other things that you preached to us that we should be doing for the last 40 years.

So we thank you for your years of service and we know that you will have no problem finding a new job with your white corporate sponsors.

                                         Best Wishes

                                        Min. Paul Scott

 

Thank you for the webspace. Best of luck

Share on Google Plus Submit to Twitter Add this Page to Facebook! Share on LinkedIn Pin It! Add this Page to Fark! Submit to Reddit Submit to Stumble Upon

Go To Commenting
The views expressed in this article are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.

Writers Guidelines

Contact Author Contact Editor View Authors' Articles
Related Topic(s): ; ; , Add Tags

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

America Mourns the Death of Joe the Racist

Why Some Blacks Don't Vote

Getting to Know the Know Bookstore: Store to Host Duke Lacrosse Accuser

Rappin' for the Republicans

Lies, Lacrosse and Lynch Mobs

Fear of a Black Jesus: The Politics of Religion

Comments

The time limit for entering new comments on this article has expired.

This limit can be removed. Our paid membership program is designed to give you many benefits, such as removing this time limit. To learn more, please click here.

Comments: Expand   Shrink   Hide  
1 people are discussing this page, with 1 comments
To view all comments:
Expand Comments
(Or you can set your preferences to show all comments, always)

 (This is a humor response)  "... by Levin Sheridan on Thursday, Jan 17, 2008 at 6:17:23 AM

 

Tell a Friend: Tell A Friend


Copyright © 2002-2014, OpEdNews

Powered by Populum