OpEdNews Op Eds

The United States of Seizure (Grotesque)

By (about the author)     Permalink       (Page 1 of 1 pages)
Related Topic(s): ; ; , Add Tags Add to My Group(s)

Well Said 1   Supported 1   Interesting 1  
View Ratings | Rate It

opednews.com Headlined to None 1/29/13

Become a Fan
  (59 fans)

(Article changed on January 29, 2013 at 14:55)

It very well can happen here:

1. Immigration. According to the new plan 11 million Tea- Partiers will be   stripped of citizenship and  deported to China to drink real tea and learn English. They will be replaced by 11 million Hispanics who know English already.

2. Hillary Clinton on her farewell visit to Europe  was greeted as follows:

- Ding- Dong, the witch is gone
-She came, we endured, she is gone.


3. Hollywood reacts to women in combat:  from now on all the WWII movies will  feature German soldiers in kilts. Colonel Stauffenberg will be called Ilse, Hitler wiill be called froilein Fuhrer and Stalin will be called  Stalina. FDR will not change. Churchill will be called Winnie as before.



4. Stephen King  will soon release a new novel 'The Killler Gun' about a  gun which actually kills people on its own. The new Bill is already in Congress to  check the guns  for paranormal.

5. The new  series Americookies will be released soon on TV. The series features  the covert Russian spy net consisting exclusively of black homosexuals whose sole purpose is to undermine the American values by  promoting the gay marriage.

6.  Dan Brown is releasing a sequel to Angels and Demons. This one is called  The Living Hell  and  the scene is staged in Stupidsville, CT. Turns out those people do not know anything about the world around  them.

7. A new foreign policy initiative  is  unveiled by the US State Department. From now on   the US personnel  in France will address  Madame Pipi (the woman in charge of the toilet) as  La Person Pipi.

8. Austerity measures. Starting  from  the Y2013  US Congresspeople are to pay for foreign brothels' visit out of their own pocket.  Among the staff it is called 'love tax'.  US call girls' services will be paid by the tax money because that's promoting jobs in the US.

9.MSM. MSNBC  had decided to hire Sarah Palin, Julianne Moore and Tina Fey  for the new talk show with Rachel Maddow. The show  will be called ' Witches of MSNBC'  and  there will be the following impersonations:

Wicked liberal Witch- Rachel
Hysterical shape- shifter- Julianne
Grotesque and Sulky Witch- Tina
Sarah- Sarah

10. Mark Sashine is going to change his non- de-plum to Mark Assashine. That sounds more appropriate  for the times current.

PS.I  can't help it. Terrorist monkeys. As Iranians  had just sent  a monkey into space and it returned- Congress is considering a bi-partisan Bill to ban monkeys  from entering the US unless they  are baptized by TSA chaplain.


In  Seizure  We Trust

 

The writer is 57 years old, semi- retired engineer, PhD, PE, CEM. I write fiction on a regular basis and I am also 10 years on OEN.


Share on Google Plus Submit to Twitter Add this Page to Facebook! Share on LinkedIn Pin It! Add this Page to Fark! Submit to Reddit Submit to Stumble Upon

The views expressed in this article are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.

Writers Guidelines

Contact Editor View Authors' Articles
Related Topic(s): ; ; , Add Tags

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

Human Coprophagia

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND

They Think Of Us As Slaves ( small note with big conclusion)

Y2012- The Year Of A Coward

The School. Reading 'To Kill a Mockingbird' in Russia

Glory and Malice

Comments

The time limit for entering new comments on this article has expired.

This limit can be removed. Our paid membership program is designed to give you many benefits, such as removing this time limit. To learn more, please click here.

Comments: Expand   Shrink   Hide  
2 people are discussing this page, with 2 comments
To view all comments:
Expand Comments
(Or you can set your preferences to show all comments, always)

if  nothing seems  that can be done.... by Mark Sashine on Tuesday, Jan 29, 2013 at 7:49:59 AM
... as you note at #10. I mean, now it's much more... by Ad Du on Tuesday, Jan 29, 2013 at 10:43:39 AM