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Arizona's Onion

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I expect we will know more about the horrific tragedy in Oklaho--I mean Arizona soon.   As a guide to the evolving "discoveries', it might be useful to lay out in advance the "conspiracy theories" that will be circulating:

Layer 1

The lone gunman:     A schizophrenic loner goes off the deep end and lashes out at "The Establishment."  

The furious Tea Party nut:   You defeated my Tea Party candidate.   Take that, and go use your government provided socialist health care!

The survivalist cabal:   Jared is our general and told us we had to strike before the black helicopters come after us.

Layer 2

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The Manchurian Candidate:   McVeigh, I mean Loughner, may have been in the military and YouTube'd about brainwashing.   Connect the dots.

CIA pawn:   Time to stir up the terrorist pot again, as the red alerts in Europe aren't enough.

Right wing radio doesn't kill people, crazy people kill people:   "We never meant for anyone to take us literally."   --Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, etc,"

Level 3

"None of this would be happening if these "nut-cases" didn't have access to the internet, where they can meet like-minded crazies, learn how to kill, and plot and implement terrorist acts against innocent Americans.   We've got to keep Americans safe--Censor the Internet!"   --New World Order Elite

Let's start an organization called "Homeland Youth".   -"Bilderberg Conference

Pick one.   And don't cry for me, America.


Jill Jackson is a writer, mother, wife, military veteran, and hard-core pacifist and liberal. She swallowed the red pill after 9/11.

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I fear for our country. And agree that so many wh... by Jennifer Moore on Saturday, Jan 8, 2011 at 6:23:52 PM
"Guns don't kill people. Crazy people with guns k... by Sister Begonia on Sunday, Jan 9, 2011 at 12:23:36 PM