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Andy Borowitz: Romney Claims Dog Ate Tax Returns and Ran Bain Capital for Three Years

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At www.newyorker.com

In a new effort to settle nagging questions about his finances, Republican Presidential pick Mitt Romney today told reporters that his dog ate his tax returns and also served as C.E.O. of Bain Capital from 1999 to 2002. 'Seamus was more than a dog,' Mr. Romney said, his voice beginning to quaver. 'As C.E.O. of Bain, he was a job creator.'

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At www.newyorker.com


 

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