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Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Armageddon: How to Know When to Bend Over and Kiss Your Derriere Au Revoir
(6 comments) End days! Duck and cover yo.....

Saturday, December 20, 2008
Laura Bush: Cook's 5,111 Nights Off
Poor baby, Laura forgot how to cook.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008
To Thine Ownself be True. The World be Damned
Inspiration for those wanting to be true to themselves.

Sunday, December 14, 2008
In Retrospect, My Job From Hell Was Funny
A hellish job under circumstances that couldn't have been much worse.

Thursday, December 4, 2008
Bail Bondsmen Bailing Themselves Out
(1 comments) The economy is even hurting the crime business.

Friday, November 28, 2008
Black Friday: My Personal Boycott
(7 comments) I'm not stepping into one store that opens before 7 a.m.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Putting Giant Condoms on Shrimp
It was all part of preparing for Thanksgiving.

Friday, November 21, 2008
Palin's Post-pardon Turkey Interview
(1 comments) Aaaaarg!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008
How the Bailout Works that Even a Dead Jackass Can Understand
(2 comments) Kain't put nuthin' over on a country boy.

Sunday, November 16, 2008
Southern California Fires: Good News, Bad News, Dubious News
Into the third day and Southern California is still on fire.

Saturday, November 15, 2008
Another Smokey Sunrise in the San Fernando Valley North of Los Angeles
(4 comments) Santa Ana winds, low humidity and fires are synonymous in Southern California.

Sunday, November 9, 2008
Credit Crunch: Bringing Back an Old-fashioned Christmas
(1 comments) Merchant greed may be out, consumer sanity and the true meaning of Christmas in.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Revolutionary Change Without a Shot Being Fired
Only in a democracy.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008
After Eight Long Years We Can Finally Exhale!
(5 comments) To President Obama.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Rove Seeds Clouds: Actual Weather in Southern California on Bellwether Election Day
What never happens is happening.

Sunday, November 2, 2008
Past Voter Apathy Equals Election Board Apathy, Long Lines
Changes are needed in how we conduct all elections.

Thursday, October 30, 2008
Banking: Truth in Jest
A letter a friend passed along.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008
From Joe the Plumber to Joe the Congressman?
(3 comments) He has a long snaking road to travel.

Monday, October 27, 2008
Single Digits Narrow Obama/McCain Race
(1 comments) Election day is almost here.

Friday, October 24, 2008
It's Official: No Matter Who Wins There Will Be Rioting
(22 comments) Los Angeles radio listeners are putting their money where there guns are.

Friday, October 24, 2008
No Need to Vote. Halloween Masks Picked the Prez and It Ain't McCain
(1 comments) And the winner is.....

Wednesday, October 22, 2008
OEN's Own Sandy Sand is Running For President. Must be True, It's on Video Tape
(4 comments) Sandy Sand for president!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008
John McCain is the New Monster Frightening Our Kids to Death
(2 comments) McCain is the new bogeyman, ghost, vampire and worst kind of monster rolled into one, who's scaring our kids.

Monday, October 20, 2008
High Ratings for SNL Was Curiosity, Not Voter Stamp of Approval for Sarah Palin
(2 comments) So-called experts are misreading SNL's highest rating in 14 years because of Sarah Palin's appearance.

Saturday, October 18, 2008
Early Returns: Tinklenberg Nets $30K After Bachmann's Appearance on Hardball
Michele Bachmann flew out of her tree and over the cuckoo's nest.

Friday, October 17, 2008
FOX to Delay World Series Game 6 Due to Hurricane Barack
Fox umpires rule money wins over ideology.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Joe the Plumber Won the Debate
(1 comments) Last debate. It's over. Thank goodness.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Mergers and Acquisitions Expected to Revive Markets
(1 comments) Investment tips for 2008 for all of you with any money left.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Behind by Six and McCain Said He "Has 'em where he wants 'em."
What'd he say? Talk about needing some mental health care.

Monday, October 13, 2008
Eerie Yellow Light From Sun Shining Through Smoke Filled Skies
(2 comments) Another fire day in the suburbs north of Los Angeles, but this is the first time I've heard that resources have been stretched so thinly.

Monday, October 13, 2008
If Any Humor is to be Found in the Economic Disaster...
(2 comments) ...this might be it.

Sunday, October 12, 2008
100 Days to Go and Bush Won't Let Lameduckedness Stop Him
(3 comments) Oh, swell.

Saturday, October 11, 2008
Ugly-ing Up the Golden Gate Bridge Won't Prevent One Suicide
(2 comments) Call me cynical, but...

Friday, October 10, 2008
Open Question for the Economic Experts at OEN
(7 comments) Question.

Saturday, October 4, 2008
Palin's Book Banning Should Have Been Ifill's First Question
(1 comments) If I were Gwen Ifill...

Wednesday, October 1, 2008
The Only Poll That Counts...
I won't even bother finishing the 'only poll that counts' sentence.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008
11th Hour Power Grab by Bush
(5 comments) Why?

Saturday, September 27, 2008
Who Won Last Night's Debate? We Did! McCain the Liar Showed Up
(9 comments) The man can't tell the truth about the simplest things.

Friday, September 26, 2008
Ma Barker is Looking Up and Smiling at Long Beach Mom on Trial for Murder
Long Beach gangster's mom rivals Ma Barker for Mother-of-the-Year Award

Friday, September 26, 2008
Rumor: McCain Wants Veep Debate Cancelled
(4 comments) Aw, don't do that.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Poor Johnny McC. Can't Bail and Debate at the Same Time
(5 comments) Johnny wants to postpone Friday night's debate.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Being a Mom: Dumbest Qualifier to be a World/Political Leader
(11 comments) You cannot make up this crap.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Obama Must Get Back to the Hill to Vote on the Bailout Bill
(4 comments) He can't just opine from the campaign trail.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Economic Terrorism: Bush's Wall Street Bailout is the Patriot Act II
Congress, don't make the same mistake twice.

Sunday, September 21, 2008
Importing HIV. They Are Nuts!
(4 comments) This is carrying 'one-world' view, one germ too far.

Saturday, September 20, 2008
NeoCons Should Love This: The Five-year Abstinence Only Afghanistan Plan
It beats Bush's seven-year war in Afghanistan plan.

Friday, September 19, 2008
Google This: Palin Muthee Witch Hunt Africa
(3 comments) It's a doozie.

Friday, September 19, 2008
A Seven-Year War in Afghanistan???
Anyone ever hear of a Bush-authorized plan for seven years of war in Afghanistan?

Friday, September 19, 2008
Palin for Prez: McCain Won't be a Lame Duck; He's a Dead Duck
(4 comments) Vampire Sarah is impaling Johnny on his own unvetted petard.

Thursday, September 18, 2008
When They Say They've Arrested, Shot and Bombed Terrorists, How Do They Know?
(1 comments) It a wonderment.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Where's the National Guard When We Need Them?
They're not under Bush's desk. They're not behind his desk chair. They're not behind the drapes. They're in Iraq!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008
It's All About Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa and Why This is a Diary and Not an Article
(5 comments) Is your city becoming as corrupt as Los Angeles, or is it there already?

Sunday, September 14, 2008
Angling for Impeachment
(1 comments) Busted Constitutional rights. Broken laws. What else?

Saturday, September 13, 2008
Elmer "McCain" Fudd Whines on and on Over Obama Ad
Oh, those Republicans. They can dish it out, but they whine "foul" when they're on the receiving end.

Saturday, September 13, 2008
Metrolink/Freight Train Head-on Collision 5 Miles From Home
(3 comments) All news is local, or so they say.

Friday, September 12, 2008
Sarah Palin is Dick Cheney in Lipstick and a Skirt
(4 comments) Just what we need, another Dick in the White House.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008
To Even Mention Book Banning is Sarah Palin at Her Dangerous Worst
(10 comments) Yesterday, Rob Kall said the Palin book-ban list is bogus. It doesn't matter that the list is the newest urban legend.

Sunday, September 7, 2008
Barack Proved Sarah Can Be Attacked on the Issues
(4 comments) And that's not sexist.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Popping the Question. Why Isn't Levi Johnston In Jail For Statutory Rape?
(8 comments) Why? Why? Why?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Palin Prediction. She Will Resign by Request
(10 comments) ESP, and a little logic says...

Monday, September 1, 2008
Breaking: Palin's Pregnant 17-year-old Progeny to Wed Baby's Procreator
(8 comments) You heard it.

Thursday, August 28, 2008
Where the "Beef" in the DNC Convention?
(10 comments) No beef. No meat. Only bland tofu served up by toothless Democrats.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Men From Mars to Cover UFO Stories: Media Formula for Whom Covers What
(3 comments) That's all they wrote.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Women Want Athletic Men to Jump in the Pool: The Sperm Pool
More jocks wanted.

Monday, August 25, 2008
The Headline Read: Dems Are Getting Nervous, Again
(1 comments) Polls, rumors and spin.

Saturday, August 23, 2008
Biden Doesn't Use His Personal Tragedy as a Crutch Like McCain
(4 comments) Joe Biden knows to keep his personal tragedies out of politics.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Veep Stakeout. Follow That Man
(4 comments) Follow the man the way you'd follow the money.

Sunday, August 17, 2008
Like Son, Like Mother. Memory Loss Runs in McCain's Family
(1 comments) Yeah, right! Nobody can 'member nuthin'.

Friday, August 15, 2008
Military Coup or Supreme Court Coup, the Results are the Same
(1 comments) Bad!

Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Prickly Thieves are Thorn in the Side of Palm Desert Police
(2 comments) Only on the left coast.

Sunday, August 10, 2008
Golf Helps Men Live Longer: They've Got To Be Kidding
(8 comments) As usual, this is yet another medical story that comes up with the wrong conclusion.

Friday, August 8, 2008
A 5.4 Earthquake, Pish. A House Fire is Work Interruptus
(5 comments) A house fire is a great reason to stop working and start gawking.

Sunday, August 3, 2008
McCain Press-bashing: Republican Label "Quarantine: Leprosy"
McCain acts like a petulant child when he doesn't get his way.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Bush Missed His Status as Gov. Execution...Until Now
(7 comments) Bush signed the military's request to execute a soldier.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Old Dog McCain Trying to Learn New-Age Computer Trick
(8 comments) From dial phones to the Internet; a giant leap for an old man.

Monday, July 21, 2008
McCain: Visit World Hot Spots or Have No Informed Opinion. Really?
(8 comments) Johnny has all the answers. All the wrong ones.

Saturday, July 19, 2008
The Event Horizon in Iraq, According to Bush
(1 comments) Only in George W. Bush's skewed mind can a horizon be reached. In plain English, he doesn't want to see us ever leave Iraq. What a shock!

Tuesday, July 15, 2008
International Red Cross: Water-boarding is Torture. Ask Them to Press Charges
(6 comments) An urgent plea from my temporarily banned OEN friend asking us to write the International Red Cross urging them to bring criminal charges against George W. Bush and Company for war crimes and breaking all international laws outlawing torture.

Monday, July 14, 2008
Breaking: McCain, L.A. Mayor Arrested at La Raza Meeting
(4 comments) Four groups declared terrorist organizations by Homeland Security.

Monday, July 14, 2008
Breaking: Clydesdales Put Out To Pasture
(15 comments) Busch people, think your jobs are safe?

Friday, July 11, 2008
Waaaaaa! I Caught MRS (Mental Recession Syndrome)
(5 comments) And it's all Phil Gramm's fault! If he wouldn't have told me I wouldn't know how sick I am. Ignorance of this catastrophic disease was such bliss.

Thursday, July 10, 2008
Ouch! Jackson Wants to Take a Guillotine to Obama
(10 comments) Another old man who should retire to the 'home.'

Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Three Nanoseconds Until McC Sings Osama's 'Bye-Bye, Iraq, It's Been Deadly Knowin' Ya' Song
(2 comments) Three nanoseconds and counting...with caveats, of course.

Sunday, July 6, 2008
Guerrilla Army Takes Over L.A.'s Concrete Jungle
(7 comments) Breaking News: Guerrilla armies take over Los Angeles!

Friday, July 4, 2008
Make Column One Independent of Un-bylined Links Starting Today, July 4th
(4 comments) This is a good day to start.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Starbucks No Longer Perking Along
(5 comments) Starbucks announced the closure of 600 stores nationwide beginning next month.

Sunday, June 29, 2008
Questions, Quirky Quarks Quase Earth-Quashing Quakes of Fears Over LHC Atom-smasher
(4 comments) Some are so concerned they have filed a law suit to prevent the LHC from being turned on.

Saturday, June 28, 2008
Going After Embedded Advertising: Hate-hate Relationship between Hollywood and the FCC
(2 comments) Embedded ads are on the FCC's hit list.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Working Girls in Nevada are Feeling Pinch of Rise in Gas Prices
(11 comments) Pity the poor working girl.

Saturday, June 21, 2008
Cat-clawing Cindy McC. Should Keep Her Mouth Shut and Stick to Plagiarizing Recipes. She's so Good at it.
(6 comments) Once again the highly paid, highly over-rated pundits have done it by getting it wrong.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008
A New Low in Despicable Republican Slime
(27 comments) It's hard to conceive that the Republicans could get lower than slime.

Monday, June 16, 2008
Obama's Veep Pick. Give it a Rest!
It's not that important to know this minute who Obama's V.P. choice is.

Sunday, June 15, 2008
John 'GHW' McCain: The Would-be President of the Obscene
(1 comments) This is the man who would be president? Maybe president of "Obscene Magazine."

Saturday, June 7, 2008
Hillary: "Yes, We Can!" And Yes, She Did!
(15 comments) Hillary Clinton suspended and endorsed. Now the real campaign games can begin.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Bill Clinton Was the Man From Hope; Barack Obama IS the Man of Hope
The Clintons are the past; Obama is the future.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Global Warming/Air Quality Muzzlers in the Bush Administration Aren't Immune to the Ill-effects
(2 comments) Heaven forbid the Bury-His-Head-in-the-Sand-in-Chief and his minions should let the facts get in the way of their political machinations.

Monday, June 2, 2008
Stupid is as Illogical Does. Feminists Supporting Hillary, But Voting For McC are Stupid and Illogical
(14 comments) Their reasons for jumping the Democratic ship will do nothing more than set their feminist cause back a thousand years.

Thursday, May 29, 2008
Obama Didn't Trip Over McDubya's Iraq Trip Dare. When Obama Goes, It Should be in Secret
(3 comments) Barack trip to Iraq without it being a circus.

Friday, May 23, 2008
Not One, But Twin Twisters Hit SoCal, But There's No Global Warming or Climate Change
(15 comments) Just ask Bush and the rest of the flat-Earthers.

Friday, May 23, 2008
States Care More About Vets' Families Than Bush
(1 comments) It's not like this will help injured surviving vets, but...

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