A man approached the minister at his church...
"Reverend," he said, "We have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What can I do?"

"I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task," said the
minister.
"Take this hat pin with you I can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and will
motion to you. When I motion, you give her good poke in the leg with the hat
pin.

He agreed to the plan. In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed off.
Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate
sacrifice for you?" he said nodding to Mr. Jones.

"Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with the
sharp hat pin. "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the minister's quick
reply. Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at her husband. Soon, Mrs.
Jones again nodded off. The minister noticed.

"Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward
Mr. Jones. "My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the
pin.

"Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face. Mrs. Jones
again gave her husband a real hard threatening glare. Before long, though,
she again nodded off. This time however, the minister did not notice. As he
picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr.
Jones mistook as signals to sharply poke his wife with the hat pin again.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his
99th son? " Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted, "You stick that thing in me
one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it where the sun don't
shine!"

"Amen!" replied all the women in the congregation.