The last step of ego death is surrender or letting go of all fear and embracing the unknown ~ for the unknown is a state of love, joy and soul consciousness that not only extends beyond time and space but also lies deepest within each one of us: Allen L Roland
The transcendent moment of surrender is a conscious act of letting go ~ that is, letting go of all fear, self-consciousness and self awareness.
It is the ultimate high but most people are terrified of this moment ~ when you momentarily escape the prison of ego consciousness and enter the world of total freedom and authenticity.
Musicians and actors strive for that moment ~ that moment when they become one with the song that they are singing or the character that they are playing.
I have experienced this moment as a singer, an actor and in love but I witnessed two excellent examples two years ago ;
Diana Krall in concert in Sonoma when she touched that moment playing and singing " Little Girl Blue " . From Paul Clayborne's first base notes I knew this was a ' happening ' and by the time she finished it ~ tears were streaming down my cheeks.
Diana knew it also and after the last note she paused and slowly murmured " That's a great song ". She had become one with the song.
Renee Zellweger reached it in Cinderella Man when she was listening to the radio describe the beating her husband Jim Braddock was taking from Max Baer ~ her whole body shook and at that moment she truly became Mae Braddock and lost herself in the process.
You can also reach it by falling in love but this takes great courage and the willingness to face the fear that the " real and authentic you ' will be loved . However, fully opening your heart is the shortest path to soul consciousness ~ for in fully opening my heart I am finally fully embracing myself.
I remember doing that very same thing several years ago when I realized that a precognitive event that I had dreamed of with someone I deeply loved was happening before my very eyes ~ while I was on the phone with her.
I knew something bigger than me was happening and I totally surrendered to it and told her as it was happening. She felt it also but quickly got off the phone.
I stayed in that heart place embracing the awe and wonder of it and knew I was embracing a tender and fragile me who longed to feel this deeply.
The next day when we got together ~ she completely denied the incident but it didn't matter ~ I had made a shift in consciousness and was seeing herself and our relationship through more clearer eyes.
In other words, it was the ultimate yes to myself and , in so doing, I was now in sync with a universal loving plan that had always been saying yes to me.
Shortly after that while singing at a wedding ~ I realized I had gone beyond self consciousness and was truly singing from my heart.
That had a profound effect on writing my book Radical Therapy and also in my work as a psychotherapist ~ but it also marked the moment in my life when I could say the same words that Jesus, Mohammad and Buddha said and know inside what they truly meant ~ " I am " which really means I am one with source or the loving plan.
For that moment of surrender had brought me back to source and I seized it and still have not let go of it ~ for source is a Unified Field of soul consciousness which lies not only beyond time and space but also deepest within each one of us.
As such, the last step of ego death is surrender but it is the step that the ego battles with great intensity ~ for the ego was created by the left brain to protect us from psychic pain and to seemingly maintain control through fear. In essence, the ego is afraid of love and our deepest joy ~ because it can't control it.
However, once we surrender to love we engage a force that is far greater than the ego and its defenses and once we conquer fear ~ we have set the stage to embrace our authentic self, our authentic vocation and our innate joyful connection to source and the Unified Field .
The journey of the heart is through doors of fear but how reassuring it is to know that the last door is surrender and beyond that door is our authentic self and connection to source.
We cannot escape our destiny and it is divine.
ONLY LOVE HEALS
Allen L Roland
Freelance columnist Allen L Roland is available for comments , interviews and speaking engagements ( allen@allenroland.com )
