The Cheburashka Scheme: Obama's Publicani Are Asking for Tools

Cheburashka

There is little doubt that the U.S. is moving away from its main constitutional principle of limited federal government toward a tax/borrow/print and spend government usurping unlimited unconstrained unconstitutional powers. In the process the government destroys individual liberties unconditionally guaranteed and protected by the Constitution.

How Did They Trick Us into Accepting the Mess?

We are on the way to a totalitarian and bankrupt (financially and morally) state. How did this happen? What was the technique the government used that tricked us into compliance and acceptance of the direction toward a “Bright Socialist Future”?

After all, by and large, Americans are proud, hard-working, freedom-loving, success-appreciating, charitable individuals. How did we become government handout and favors seekers, racial, sexual, and religious whiners, who-do-you-know what-group-do-you-belong-to and not what-can-you-do people?

The Cheburashka Scheme

After thinking long and hard, I came to realize that it’s all based on a single political technique, the Cheburashka scheme. It’s not that faced with a problem the federal government develops new and advanced methods for how to cloud our minds. They use the same technique over and over again. It’s simple and powerful. And it works.

It works on you regardless of whether you are a Republican or Democrat, and it works for the government regardless of whether it is Republican or Democrat. It does not require a lot of work in selling another anti-constitutional, liberty killing, federal government expanding, money wasting government initiative. Of course, they use focus groups, polls, and speech writers to refine the technique, but they always end up with a variation of the Cheburashka scheme that a friend once told me.

Imagine a person, a young man, walking down a street in Moscow, say during the 80’s. He sees a young woman crossing his path. She slows down and opens her coat for a brief moment exposing her nakedness to the complete stranger. Then she wraps herself back up in her coat and walks away as if nothing had happened. Nobody noticed anything. The young man continues his walk when, in a couple of minutes, a man approaches him and asks: “Did you see Cheburashka?” “Yes,” replies the still somewhat confused young man. “Pay three rubles.”

So this is the scheme in its genius simplicity: provide a service that the person didn’t ask for and then present a bill.

(It is irrelevant of course that Cheburashka is a well-known Russian toy and a hero of many famous children’s cartoons, invented in 60’s by the Russian writer Eduard Uspensky. “Cheburashka” has the same relevance as Ella Fitzgerald’s chi-chi: “I can’t give you anything but chi-chi.”)

Cheburashka in the U.S.

How do politicians use the Cheburashka scheme? Here are a few examples.

“Did you see War on Terror?” “Pay.” “Did you see special programs for mortgages to people who couldn’t afford them?” “Pay.” “Farm subsidies?” “Social security?” “Drugs approval?” “Healthcare?” “Did your company receive bailouts?” “Did you get a low interest loan?” “Do you deduct your mortgage?” “Do you enjoy government-insured deposits?” “Pay, Pay, Pay!”

Like the young man on the street in Moscow, you are desperately looking around, feeling insulted, violated, yet left alone to the grace of your burglar. You realize that you are innocent but an integral part of the Cheburashka scheme: its target, its engine, and its facilitator.

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