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At last the Missouri Republican Congress has come up with a great idea - repeal the child labor laws. (http://www.alternet.org/newsandviews/article/475205/missouri_gop_wants_to_repeal_child_labor_laws/) (Mo Senate Bill 222 )
This proposal not only allows the Republican Party to finally fly its true colors in all their gory (Oops, that should have been glory. Sorry.), but gives the G.O.P. several ways to crow about it. I can hear them now in the campaigns of 2012.
Just think about the impacts:
Immigration control: There will be no need to waste valuable federal justice system time and money investigating labor practices because we've eliminated unnecessary laws that kept children out of the workplace. Now we can fulfill our promise to keep foreigners away from our jobs. All federal personnel previously engaged in safeguarding children from labor abuses can now be armed and assigned to border patrol duty. Any Mexican children attempting to cross the border and take these jobs can be shot on sight thus saving additional funds trying to track them down after they've entered the country.
Reduced crime rate: With all the poor children in jobs, the delinquency rate will be cut significantly. After all, even a kid will be too bushed after a day's hard work to be out running around at night.
Reduced welfare costs: Welfare costs will drop drastically, because poor children will no longer get federal dollars for food, living expenses or medical care. They will now be fully employed and paying their own way. They'll be off the Medicaid roles - the family income will no longer qualify them for that coverage. We'll also reduce the cost of medical care because employers won't be required to insure these children, thus preventing them from accessing medical care at all -- a stroke of pure genius!
Created jobs: The G.O.P. policy of allowing child labor could create thousands of new jobs for the state of Missouri. At the same time we will attract many new businesses to the state drawn by the prospect of cheap labor without the hassle of regulatory control. Naturally it won't really help unemployed people get jobs because the children will get them instead of the adults who lost their jobs during the recession, but it will look great in the statistics and should be a real vote getter for the Republican Party.
Reduced education costs: At last, a way to cut educational and school lunch costs without hurting the upper classes. Poorer children won't be using up valuable educational resources with no payback to the system.
The coup d'gras: Over time the cheap labor force created by the presence of a growing segment of the population with no education will make sure that our corporate management personnel can maintain the standard of living to which they have become accustomed without any fear that an educated working class might become angry enough to overturn their heavily laden apple cart. This will also bolster the stock market - a win-win situation for everybody. Well, maybe with some minor exceptions.
Doesn't it make you proud, Missouri?
