Reuters February 6, 2011: the Swiss will arrest the erstwhile President of the United States, better known to Washington insiders as Boy W. George, for violating the terms of the Convention on Torture, which was signed in 1987 by 147 countries including the United States and Switzerland, if he sets foot in Switzerland as planned.
Bush was slated to be the keynote speaker at a Jewish Charity organization, Kareen Hayesod. Ironically he allegedly was going to commiserate about torture, injustice and other atrocities during the Nazi era.
To avoid arrest, he canceled the trip.
The nerve of the Swiss.
Just because Boy W. George not only admitted authorizing and condoning torture, but had the b's to brag about it in his new book and in interviews promoting the book.
Arrest? Put on trial?
We're talking Boy W. George here not some South American dictator like Augusto Pinochet. Pinochet was arrested in Spain and put on trial in Chile for authorizing torture. Or Chad's Hissene Habre. Habre also has been charged with authorizing torture. He is hiding in exile. Lawyers for the Convention on Torture (using the laws of Universal Jurisdiction) are trying to extradite him.
Does this mean that the erstwhile President of the United States is also hiding in exile?
Technically Bush did not cancel his visit, the Jewish Charity organization did.
To save Bush face, they made the excuse that "there were security issues." Maybe they should have come up with a better excuse. True there would be some human rights activists protesting his visit. But we're talking Switzerland here, for Christ's Sake, not Egypt.
Switzerland where cute chalets abound on clear lakes surrounded by pristine, snow-covered mountains. Where a favored mode of transportation is to ski. Where rosy-cheeked lads and lasses yodel. Where the crime rate is among the lowest in the industrialized world.
And to be sure, Boy W. George didn't have to worry about being water boarded in Switzerland.
Boy W. George is angry. He was looking forward to his new career as a public speaker. And public speaking, to say the least, has never been his forte -. He himself couldn't believe that they were actually willing to pay real money to the guy who said stuff like, "I think anybody who doesn't think I'm smart enough to handle the job is underestimating."
Ironically the Bush family has always admired the Swiss (almost as much as they adore the Saudis)" what with all those Swiss bank accounts and all.
What really hurts is that it's not only human-rights advocates in Switzerland who want Bush prosecuted. Dominique Baettig, a right-wing member of the Swiss Parliament formally requested that Bush be prosecuted. Bush is alleged to have asked, "Has the whole world gone mad?"
What he really doesn't understand is why the Swiss won't accept the concept of American exceptionalism - that what goes for the rest of the world, does not necessarily apply to "real" Americans.
Ask Sarah Palin, she'll tell you.
Not to worry. No doubt Boy W. George will soon pull himself together. He will realize that he has some options.
First of all there is the French-fry option.
Boy W. George himself devised this brilliant tactic when the French decided that there were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. He declared that French fries would now be called American fries.
This time he could rename Swiss cheese. The only thing holding this idea up is that the name, American cheese, is already taken.
Another option is Daddy" the other erstwhile president.
Bush Sr. already proved his mettle in December 2010, when he negotiated a deal with authorities in Abuja, Nigeria on behalf of Bush Jr.'s best friend and confidant, Dick Cheney. According to the Nigerian authorities Cheney was guilty of bribery and money laundering, and they wanted him prosecuted.
Daddy convinced the Nigerian government to accept $250 million dollars if the authorities agreed to drop the charges. Which means Daddy got Cheney off on the bribery charges for a mere quarter of a billion dollars" that is to say, by bribing the authorities.
Hold on" We'd better get this article in, and soon. Daddy no doubt is on his way to Switzerland as we write. He'll no doubt tap one of his Swiss bank accounts to write an even bigger check than the one that was written for Cheney.
After all we're not talking about saving Boy W. George's face here "
but his ass.