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Philipisms

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opednews.com Headlined to H4 8/17/12

We were married 32-years, and together 33. I heard his stories over and over again and never tired of hearing them. I laughed every time, sometimes even harder then I did the first time I heard them.  

When it was his bachelor party time, he was a little afraid that his shenanigans played on his buddies on their bachelor party nights just might come back to haunt him.



Philip Mugging by Norma Sherry

He told me the story of he and his buds taking another of their inner circle and the groom-to-be out for a night of fun. They got him extremely drunk, then brought him to a nurse friend who put him in a head to toe cast leaving his eyes uncovered, his mouth opened and breathing holes! But everything else was covered in white casting plaster.

He told me that they brought him into the local emergency room and had a medical person do the casting because they didn't want to risk suffocating him! (This was in the 70's, and obviously hospitals and their personnel were more lenient back then. Also, lucky for them they knew the medical technician.)

After the full body cast was on, they took the unsuspecting young man to his bride-to-be's home. They rang the doorbell and hid. The door opened, and with a loud thud, he fell forward straight into the house. The boys heard the women screech and they took off running.  

Philip was doubled over laughing so hard he could barely make it back to the car. Later he learned it took the entire night to chisel him out of his body cast.

Another close friend and groom-to-be, was taken out and gotten drunk, (a reoccurring theme), then put on the Long Island railroad train. They handcuffed him to one of the center poles and stripped him naked...and left him.

As the story goes, he wasn't found until all the routes were done and the trains were brought in to be cleaned in the wee hours of the night! He made it to his wedding in the nick of time.

As hilarious as I thought these stories were, my all-time favorite took place when Philip was a high school freshman. He told me that he and his buddy, Vinnie, who was under five feet, decided to go to the local diner on bowling night.

Historically, bowling night filled the diner. They planned and choreographed their bit to perfection. (Remember Philip was a want-a-be actor/director his entire life.)

Philip entered the diner first. He wore a caftan type robe, a gold turban covering his curls, dark pancake makeup with a red dot between his eyes. He walked in and the loud congeniality of the diners came to an immediate hush.

Philip took a seat at the farthest end of the counter, took out his newspaper and with great flourish he opened it, spread it out and folded it to appear to read a section. The diners relaxed and began their loud chatter again, when Vinnie arrived.  

Tiny Vinnie was dressed identically as Philip, but he was carrying a hatbox. Again the diners became silent as all eyes were on the two men in robes with dots on the foreheads. Vinnie took a seat at the farthest opposite end of the diner counter, and he waited for the diners to become accustomed to the spectacle.

Once all was normal in the diner again, Vinnie opened up the hatbox, removed a wax head from the box and began a chant. Everyone was starring when Vinnie took out a long knitting needle from under his robe and ceremoniously, with a loud chant stabbed the waxed head.  

In unison, Philip grabbed his head, screamed and fell to the floor! Pandemonium broke out. The diners jumped over the tables and over each other in a scramble to save themselves and get out of the diner all the time shrieking and screaming with fear.

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www.togetherforeverchanging.org

Norma Sherry is co-founder of TogetherForeverChanging.org, an organization devoted to educating, stimulating, and igniting personal responsibility particularly with regards to our diminishing civil liberties. She is also an award-winning (more...)
 

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The much anticipated Philipisms. I hope you enjoy ... by Norma Sherry on Friday, Aug 17, 2012 at 5:11:16 AM
After the full body cast was on, they took the un... by Norma Sherry on Friday, Aug 17, 2012 at 5:47:34 AM