It's eerie, watching Glen Beck's continuing descent into madness, with his ridiculous warning that President Obama is assembling a private army of storm troopers comprised of -- get this -- AmeriCorp volunteers. Ooooh, nothing's scarier than a legion of fresh-faced college students, armed to invade . . . what? The local Starbucks? Beck further demonstrated his mental instability with a bizarre segment during which he frantically scrawled random phrases on a white board, claiming they held some secret message about Obama's plan to conquer the universe or something. Seeming to channel some demonic cheerleader, he shouted: "Gimme an Obama!" Then wrote the letter "O." Gimme a "Left!" Then wrote the letter "L." The freak show continued with the words "Graft," "ACORN," "Revolutionaries," Hidden Agenda," and the letter "Y," as in Y in the name of all that is rational are Americans watching this maniac?
Beck took all the first letters from his weird word list, twisted his Harry Potter magic decoder ring, and spelled out Obama's secret plan for America: "OLIGARHY!"
Uh . . . Glenn? That's, um, not a word. Maybe it's a word in George Bush's dyslexicon, but not in any, uhm, normal dictionary. Beck is hurting for sponsors -- maybe he could nab an account with "Hooked on Phonics?" Couldn't hurt. Oh, and hey, Glenn -- Gimme a "T!" That stands for Thorazine. Get some. Quickly.
In other news of the weird, Cheney needs a hug. Seriously. His battered and bruised and still clicking heart is broken over that mean ol' President Obama and that bully Attorney General Eric Holder who broke their promise not to investigate his many war crimes.
Cheney crawled out of his sacred box of dirt to appear on (where else) "Fox "News' Sunday" with Chris Wallace, where he pouted over the administration's decision to, y'know, actually hold people accountable for their crimes:
"We had the president of the United States, President Obama, tell us a few months ago there wouldn't be any investigation like this, that there would not be any look back at CIA personnel who were carrying out the policies of the prior administration," Cheney said. "Now they get a little heat from the left wing of the Democratic Party, and they're reversing course on that."
Stranger still, The Dark Lord then growled his displeasure at the apparent snub from President Obama, as the President is not seeking Cheney's counsel on foreign policy matters.
"I guess the other thing that offends the hell out of me, frankly, Chris, is we had a track record now of eight years of defending the nation against any further mass casualty attacks from Al Qaeda. The approach of the Obama administration should be to come to those people who were involved in that policy and say, "How did you do it? What were the keys to keeping this country safe over that period of time?'"
So Cheney got his wires in a tangle over this slap in the pacemaker from Obama because the president doesn't want foreign policy tips and tricks from a war criminal. OMG. That would be like asking Jeffery Dahmer for cooking tips. Hey, Dick -- maybe Obama isn't seeking your help because he wants to actually follow the laws and international treaties entered into by America. Because he respects the U.S. Constitution, our ethics and values, and -- unlike you -- actually has a conscience. And a soul. Y'think?
And then there's another crazed Republican -- Mike Huckabee-- who believes that "ObamaCare" would've sentenced Senator Ted Kennedy to an earlier demise had it been enacted previously.
Wow, what a cadre of kooks! It's hard to believe it's just Monday...
