OpEdNews - Article: MEMO TO THE PRESIDENT / DICK CHENEY

To: George W Bush

From: Richard Cheney

The Ducks are in order

Everything is proceeding according to plan. With General Patraeus now in place we can do our bidding in the Middle East.

Iran's recent missile show and tell was a bluff ~ we have them where we want them. Elizabeth tells me everything is in place within Iran and they await our action. ( It doesn't get much better than this ~ chuckle )

We'll have Israel take the lead in a preemptive bombing action and we will retaliate strongly if Iran retaliates against Israel and /or ourselves.

I've got it all worked out in the War Room ~ ( I love playing with those model ships and missiles ~ it reminds me of when I was a kid ~ like when you used to blow up frogs ~ but I digress )

Your new "Terrorist tribunal " Bill working itself through Congress this week, redefining the treatment of detainees, was a sure win until CNN's Cafferty got a hold of it and read the fine print ~ where yourself and all of us are pardoned for potential war crimes starting from 9/11. Here's the video, in case you missed it ~ two minute video <http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=jHQ7Prwh7Gc&;amp;NR=1> "President Bush PARDONS HIMSELF From POTENTIAL WARCRIMES"

Cafferty reported that deep within the "Terrorist Tribunal" Act is a provision retroactively pardoning the President, Vice President, and their subordinates for violations of the War Crimes Act committed since September 11, 2001. ( He's right of course, and we'll deny it, of course ~ a misunderstanding and we'll rewrite it as a signing statement ~ if we have to )

I wouldn't worry about it, chief ~ the spineless Democrats passed FISA and they don't want to rock the boat ( or risk the wrath of FOX News ~ chuckle ) before November.

If they don't pass it and start really putting together the dots on 9/11 and the Iraq build up ~ we always have our 98,840 acre ranch in Paraguay protected by a semi-secret U.S. military base manned by our own American troops . http://www.grandinite.com/2007/08/24/bush-buys-99000-acre-compound-on-aquifer-in-paraguay/

( That was perhaps my best brainchild )

Just remember, we'll leave office with our guns blazing ~ just like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid ( your favorite movie, I do believe )

Witness Lifting the offshore oil Ban ( That was a shot across the bow reminding Congress that we're still the deciders and they can't or won't stop us ~ but vetoing the Medicare Bill today really got their attention ) http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25674571/

Of course, we could free our oil by releasing a small
portion of the more than 700 million barrels of oil we have put in the Strategic Petroleum Reserve ~ but that might dampen the buying frenzy ( chuckle )

As for John McCain ~ he's committed to carrying on my ( I mean your ) legacy and actually buys into our Iraq and economic spin ~ he actually thought the stimulus checks and Iraq Surge were going to make a difference ( can you believe it ~ chuckle )

Shred this immediately !

Angler

( In case you've forgotten ~ that's my secret service code name )

Allen L Roland http://blogs.salon.com/0002255/2008/07/15.html

Freelance Online columnist and psychotherapist Allen L Roland is available for comments, interviews, speaking engagements and private consultations ( allen@allenroland.com )
Allen L Roland is a practicing psychotherapist, author and lecturer who also shares a daily political and social commentary on his weblog and website allenroland.com He also guest hosts a monthly national radio show TRUTHTALK on www.conscioustalk.net