1. He could co-opt the "change"- theme by campaigning on his Monty Python motto, "And now for something completely different!"-
2. He could rename the White House "Fawlty Towers"- and the Homeland Security Department "the Ministry of Silly Walks"-.
3. He could re-write the dead parrot sketch and substitute Osama Bin Laden:  "No, no, he's not dead, he's restin'!"-
4. Who better to oversee the Pentagon, the CIA, and the Defense Department than the writer of "Ripping Yarns"-?
5. He could refer to former President Bush as the Upper Class Twit of the Year.
6. He could reward big ticket contributors like Bill Gates or Steve Jobs with sleepovers in the Lincoln Bedroom and private performances of Spamalot. 
7. When the Knights who say Nyet won't let him pass through Georgia without giving them a shrubbery, he could send them a Bush.        
8. He could do the Cheese Shop sketch with Ben Bernanke, Chairman of the Federal Reserve.  "I'm afraid we're fresh out of Fannie Mae funds."-  "Freddie Mac funds have been on order for 2 weeks, but the van broke down."-
9. He could respond to Larry Craig with "nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more."-
10. For the first time in 8 years we'd have a president that writes a joke rather than IS one.

What?  What?  It's not Michael--it's Sarah?  Who's Sarah?!  Was she that blond woman in the lumberjack sketch?  No?  Oh. 

Then, in the words of Emily Litella, "Never mind."-   And the 16 ton weight falls on this column.