Share on Google Plus Share on Twitter Share on Facebook Share on LinkedIn Share on PInterest Share on Fark! Share on Reddit Share on StumbleUpon Tell A Friend 1 (1 Shares)  
Printer Friendly Page Save As Favorite View Favorites (# of views)   1 comment

OpEdNews Op Eds

If Corporations Are People, I'm All for DOMA

By       Message Gar Smith     Permalink
      (Page 1 of 2 pages)
Related Topic(s): ; ; ; ; , Add Tags Add to My Group(s)

View Ratings | Rate It

opednews.com Headlined to H4 4/28/13

- Advertisement -

By Gar Smith


If .corporations are people,. is EXXON a man or a woman? by Gar Smith

Under the Supreme Court's Citizens United ruling, corporations are now granted the rights of living people -- specifically the right to make unlimited financial contributions to political campaigns in the name of "free speech."

Of course, "the law in all its majesty" also allows the homeless and the poor the same right to given massive amounts of personal wealth to politicians and political campaigns.

But if we accept that corporations are people, what other rights follow?

Well, human individuals have the right to marry. And that is why those who cherish the traditional definition of marriage support DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act.

And make no mistake -- corporations DO marry. Except the procedure is better known as "merger."

- Advertisement -

Under law (as informed by GOP-centric "family values" advocates), marriage is a contract between a single man and a single woman granted for the sole purpose of procreation -- having and raising children.

Under this definition, it would seem that US corporate lifestyles exist in flagrant violation of these bedrock family values.

When we consider Exxon-Mobil, is Exxon the gentleman and Mobil the lady? Is it Mr. Goldman and Mrs. Sachs? Mr. Merrill and Mrs. Lynch?

No. The fact is that corporations are neither male nor female and thus, under neo-con lore, they are ineligible to participate in the sacred practice of marriage/merger.

These corporations are, in short, involved in impermissible liaisons --- same-sexless-marriages, to be precise.

- Advertisement -

There is an added behavioral problem with these disreputable corporate citizens. Many of them are so fond of illicit marriage/mergers that they overdo it and engage in multiple engagements -- committing polyandry, a practice banned by federal law.

Case in point: AOL Time Warner.

Such serial mergers/marriages must be seen as an affront to all right-thinking neo-cons. Such abominations cry out for swift condemnation and require a call for a speedy and public divorce/dissolution.

Corporate marriages also fail to pass muster because they do not lead to procreation. Corporations -- even under the most robust and fertile mergers -- do not produce true offspring. (And, as a matter of fact, no "living" corporation has yet produced a detectible heartbeat.) Worse, the activities of many multinationals result in explosions, fires and industrial accidents that create widows and orphans.

Next Page  1  |  2

 

- Advertisement -

View Ratings | Rate It

Gar Smith is a Project Censored Award-winning reporter and is co-founder and editor of Environmentalists Against War and the author of Nuclear Roulette.

Share on Google Plus Submit to Twitter Add this Page to Facebook! Share on LinkedIn Pin It! Add this Page to Fark! Submit to Reddit Submit to Stumble Upon


Go To Commenting

The views expressed in this article are the sole responsibility of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of this website or its editors.

Writers Guidelines

Contact AuthorContact Author Contact EditorContact Editor Author PageView Authors' Articles
- Advertisement -

Most Popular Articles by this Author:     (View All Most Popular Articles by this Author)

Hillary's Email Bombshell: Saudi's Financed the Benghazi Attack - World Beyond War . . .

'Confession' of Accused CIA Spy Reveals Link to US Videogame Maker

I've Had It with These Masked Thugs

The Mittmobile: Imagining a Uranium-powered Car

If Corporations Are People, I'm All for DOMA

The Deplorax: The Lorax Goes Hollywood