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"Here's looking at you, kid!" - HOW TO DUPE A SUPER POWER! - (The REAL STORY behind INDO-US Row)

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"A fool's paradise is a wise man's hell." - Thomas Fuller

India and America were almost "bhai-bhai", brethren till the end of 2013. By the beginning of 2014, they almost came to the brink of bidding a belligerent bye-bye. Thankfully, after much hue and cry, taking curative steps, now, the Indian diplomat who had been at the threshold of this controversy has been allowed to come back to India, "expelled" by America. Lest anybody breathes easy, India too "ordered" the U.S. to withdraw a same-level diplomat, Wayne May and her spouse Alicia Muller - who, highhandedly had screwed up matters between the world's two largest democracies.

It is interesting, however, to note that yet, not satiated with their "good" deed, since their unceremonious expulsion from New Delhi, these two godly folks have bedeviled all on both sides of the globe by passing some hateful, disparaging and racist remarks about India and against Indians, saying on Facebook - "It's the vegetarians that are doing the raping, not the meat-eaters." And then, some more. Thank heavens, they have since then left their embassy in New Delhi for their safe haven, hopefully, in a "cozy" posting in Timbuktu!

It is well understood by all and sundry that this quid pro quo, "standard" diplomatic, reciprocal action taken by Indians was no thing more than a "nice" tit for tat. Sort of, both sides saying but not, "You, mouse! You, rat!"

By now, everybody knows that Devyani Khobragade, the diplomat from India posted in the US, was idiotically "cavity"-stripped-searched, handcuffed in public and jailed by some dorks of the government kind - egged on by a "more-white-assed-than-thou", an overzealous "tanned" Indian-American prosecutor - with some "motherland" issues in his genes. For, everybody who was anybody amongst arresting American minions was in the know that this Indian lady enjoyed diplomatic immunity. Yet, how dared they do what they did?

"Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." - George Carlin

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A sizable number of ultra right-wingers in America, as they are largely perceived to be and are wont to do in international affairs, inadvertently took their government's official line, blind as a bat - balling a full-toss, taking a faulty wicket - in the process, losing their thinking cap. The public at large, in India, fumed. The Indian government and politicians, sensing the general public mood, of wanting to take on the cross-eyed governmental over-lords in America, did what every self-respecting pit-bull is apt to do. It bit back.

Were we to magnanimously discount any suspected underhand dealings of the CIA in India, not that it is disbelieved anywhere - (for, there have been some such incidents in the past whereby the US has been accused of trying to undermine the sovereign authority of India) - then, it may be safely let out that both the East and the West, ill-advised, washing in the open their undergarments and vest, were plain simply cuckolded.

Hamlet: Madam, how like you this play?

Queen: The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

Thus viewed, this unenviable international gaffe can be easily simplified and that wisely, short-sentenced - It is an immigrant bullshit, you twits!

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"Methinks" the Indian domestic help, who complained she was not being paid at-par wages by the diplomat, just wanted to lick the cream off many an Indian's candy dream - of "Coming to America!" Rest was just a third-rate, indigenous version of a Shakespearean comic-tragedy, badly scripted by an overambitious Indian maid, without getting "made". Believe you me, many of my homies from Punjab - since God became American - has similarly made it to the US, by their knickers if not shorts. By more lies than god-forsaken sighs. Hell, I can vouch for a couple of no-good jokers from my own chew-gummed good family lineage, at this very moment thumbing their noses at the Americans, as a goody-good-in-your-hood US citizen. By virtue of a bit too well airily told 'fairy' tale.

It must be remembered, the lady servant's father-in-law was employed by an American diplomat in New Delhi. Her husband too was working as a driver with another foreign official in India. Her mother-in-law also had worked for a US official. The whole family knew well how to oil the cockles of unsuspecting foreigners. Against this "made" street-smart coterie who had hit the lottery, the friendly "adversary" had absolutely no chance of mating any luck - hence, the American were just sitting ducks.

"Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives." - Oscar Wilde

By Indian standards, as a family, they were making more than an honest official in India does - well, if he or she is not on the take. But if the available nuggets of this maid-to-dishonor's "sayings" are any clue, then, it does not take a Pink Panther to make out that she nurtured hopes of sticking around in the host country, for good - by being up to no good. Hence, this lot, my dear beloved motherland's sired, were together able to conjure up a sorry, sob story to be-fool a bigoted "Evangelical" American or two in the US embassy; who, in turn, helped whisk away this disingenuous "poor Christian" maid's family from India to America, by stealth and deceit, in the middle of the night - as if rescuing a nun without fun, from a dark dictatorship, and not from the world's largest dorky, dumbfounded democracy that in actuality India is.

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Author. Metaphysical Poet. Writer. FREE MYSTIC. M.B.A. Th.D. (Doctor of Theology and Divinity. PhD (Doctor of Philosophy in Religious Studies and Metaphysics). Trained in Yoga and Classical Indian (Vocal) Music. Written more than 30 (more...)

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