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W's Conscience Speaks-Finally!

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"I told you who I am. I'm your conscience."

"Sure, and I'm Bugs Bunny. I'm putting some earplugs in and wrapping this pillow around my head."

"Stop fighting it, George. This is one battle you can't win no matter how many operatives your daddy hires."

"Oh yeah? We'll see about that. I can't hear a word you say because you don't exist... I can't hear a word you say because you don't exist... I can't hear a word you say because you don't exist... I can't hear a word you say because you don't exist..."


Finally, it's quiet. I guess he's gone, whatever he was. I wonder if this is some kind of scheme to drive me crazy, a CIA MK-ULTRA mind control thing and the agents are in on it. I know, if he comes back I'll tape record the voice as proof that it's real and there's a plot against me. I'll ring for coffee and start my day over like nothing happened.

"Bring me my coffee and butter toast."

OK, there's a new tape in the recorder. I'll nonchalantly hit record and then engage conscience boy in a conversation and... [click] ... tape is rolling.

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"So, uh. Mr. Conscience, I was wondering if you have any Kansas songs in your repertoire, maybe "Dust in the Wind'. That was a great song. Whatever happened to them, anyhow? So, are you there? What's the matter, Mr. Conscience, cat got your tongue?"


I guess he knows when he's beaten, when he's up against a wily foe he can't outmaneuver. Whatever that was about, it didn't work. Guess I can turn the tape machine off.

(knock on door)

Ah, coffee and butter toast. Yum. Let's start the day over.

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"Yeah, come in. Put the tray right here. All right. First some coffee--"


"Arrrhhhh! Owwww, that's HOT! Geez, look what you made me do! You made me spill coffee all over myself and the bed!"

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Leni Matlin was born in NYC and attended Brooklyn College before moving to California in his twenties. For the better part of his adult life, he has worked as a musician (keyboards / vocals) and played in more bands then he can remember, while (more...)

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I'd like to see it performed by actors.... by Don Smith on Sunday, Sep 16, 2012 at 12:47:23 PM