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The Origin of Evil. A review.

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You can see "If I Did It" as complementary to that, as it's only about the Fall itself.

"If I did it": The Fall of "O.J."

For years "O.J." has tried to convince people he is not a murderer.

Now he has this idea that he might prove his innocence scientifically, by working out the alternative hypothesis in a book ... With this idea he goes to a publisher who reacts enthusiastically, gives him a contract and an advance payment, and makes arrangements to hire him a ghostwriter.

Some time later "O.J." comes to the conclusion that his idea might have seemed very good in the abstract, but cannot be worked out in practice. So he goes back to the publisher and says he wants to write a different book, about his relationship with the character "Nicole"; she says that is O.K., as long as he puts in that confession; as he finds out now that that is how she interpreted his hypothesis story. He protests, but it seems he has some kind of a contractual obligation to confess to a double murder ...

By sheer coincidence the ghostwriter happens to be someone who testified against him in court. Now the publisher gives this ghostwriter the assignment to make sure "O.J." puts in that confession.

This is not a very likely story; like I say, it's fiction.

At the beginning of the book "O.J." is someone who has escaped from the Fall. "Nicole" regularly accuses him of all kinds of things but as these are in general rather absurd this has no effect. It seems she doesn't really want to be taken seriously ... But in 1989 it goes wrong. In the eyes of the world his pleading "no contest" in that trial was a confession.

Still, he doesn't make a big deal out of it. Later "Nicole" says this has been the turning point in their marriage ... you could say it was the beginning of his downfall.

But when the story reaches 1994 the devil comes into action. He wants for him now to confess to a brutal double murder. "O.J." is put under terrible pressure and when he starts to cave in the author, playing the part of his subconscious, reminds him of how, as an adolescent, he liberated himself from the effects of original sin -- does he want to surrender now?

"O.J." never really understood what he was doing back then, he didn't know his motives, so whether this warning helped I don't know. He does tell the story but the devil cannot make him leave out "keep in mind, this is hypothetical" and he puts in a lot of impossible things; but he knows people will take it as a confession anyway.

So now "O.J." starts to play the murderer ""O.J."". He tries to work him self up to a state of anger, and give himself a somewhat plausible motive. Some of that anger, I suppose, is "O.J."'s own anger about being forced to confess, you can feel the pressure he is under.

"Acting is re-acting" as Rod Steiger said, and here you see what Mr. Fenjves' most important function has been.

But when it comes to actually committing the crime, "O.J." cannot make ""O.J."" do it. Unlike the guy playing him he is not such a great actor, he cannot make ""O.J."" that different from himself; moreover, I don't think he wants to give a detailed description of that crime. So you get the before and the after the event, but not the event itself.

All this is exactly as it should be, as the Fall is now something that happens on two levels at the same time. To "O.J." for whom this is the confession and to ""O.J."" who is innocent one moment and finds himself covered with blood the next, two dead bodies laying on the ground, and he doesn't know what happened ... So it hits you twice, in two ways, at the same time. This is the most shocking thing I ever read. It's absolutely horrible.

Gradually "O.J." returns to reality and the fantasy story ends with "The last hour was just a nightmare." It's over.

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I am a Dutch woman. I was born in 1947.
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