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March 13, 2008 at 19:42:18

Why Eliot Spitzer Should Have Resigned ... And Why He Shouldn't Have

by David Michael Green     Page 2 of 2 page(s)

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Once we were told that masturbation was a sin, and yet we as a society seem to have grown up enough to transcend that one. (Or mostly, anyhow. The website Bible.com reports that "What does the bible say about masturbation?" is one of their most frequently asked questions. Don’t even get me started on the implications of that. Anyhow, they go on to explain that, yes, in fact, it is a sin.) I guess we’re each on our own to deal with the hairy palm issue (hint: try Windex), but at least American society seems to have largely outgrown the absurdity of viewing jerking-off as a sin. What an accomplishment, eh? No wonder we’re the greatest power in the world.

We also seem to have largely managed to transcend prohibitions on married couples using birth control, people engaging in premarital sex, and now even homosexual relations. It took us a very, very long time, and by no means are we entirely there yet. But American attitudes toward sexuality are certainly more mature today than they were a generation or two ago.

Most people get that these are private matters, subject to private morality. And, almost without exception, the ones that don’t – from Swaggart to Haggard – are the very same people who are personally engaged in the most twisted stuff, as they alternate between repressing and expressing their sexual urges. Preaching to you about how you’re going to rot in hell is no doubt a way for them to grapple with the bundle of massive internal fears driven by their own continually resurfacing proclivities. So maybe if we stop filling people up with biblical scare stories concerning their basic human instincts, we can stop reproducing this madness on TV sets and in pulpits. Hey, America, this memo’s for you: Birds do it. Bees do it. So do, gulp, humans.

A mature society would realize that sexual mores need to be defined by individuals, within limits dictated by real physical or psychological harm. A good place to start is by emphasizing the ‘consenting’ and ‘adult’ parts of that eponymous formula. If consenting adults want to do it, and no one is harmed, there is little reason to imagine why it should be outlawed or even morally suspect (raised eyebrows or the occasional whispered snicker would still be permitted, however, at least where the kinkiest stuff is concerned). Look, some people like to have sex in beds, others in airplane restrooms. Some people like to wear Bozo costumes while doing it, others like to sing Broadway show tunes. Unless you desperately need to go potty at 30,000 feet and all the toilets are occupied, or you happen to be Secretary-Treasurer of the Anti-Clown Discrimination Association, who cares?

Similarly, partners need to negotiate what works best for them in their sexual relations, and that is just not a matter of the public interest. Some couples might be happiest in non-exclusive relationships. That should be their prerogative, without legal or moral penalty. If Eliot Spitzer promised his wife he’d be faithful to her alone, then she absolutely deserves a giant apology and more from him. But it’s really not our business. It’s bad enough for her that she has had to live through this personal ordeal. But the additional shame and public humiliation is only there because of our society’s warped sexual morality.

With luck, someday we’ll be able to look back at that set of morals, and their consequences, with a cringe and a groan. Europeans largely do. When former French president François Mitterrand died in 1996, his wife invited the old codger’s mistress and his daughter by her to the funeral. Nobody blinked too much, and afterwards Mrs. Mitterrand received letters from other ‘illegitimate’ children, thanking her for helping to bring them out of the closet of social disrespect.

Perhaps the point is now moot where Eliot Spitzer is concerned. He threw in the towel as New York governor, consigning himself to a lifetime of his name being used as a Jay Leno punch-line, along with the likes of Larry Craig and Bill Clinton. And, anyhow, his case is complicated by the not inconsequential matter of his hypocrisy, his arrogance, and his altogether-too-gleeful profiting from the mistakes of others.

But just the same, isn’t it time that this country grows up a little and stops obsessing about other people’s rather basic human behaviors?

Wouldn’t we have all been better off in a world where Spitzer had apologized profusely – but privately – to his wife, and then gone back to work improving the lives of the people of New York?

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www.regressiveantidote.net

David Michael Green is a professor of political science at Hofstra University in New York.  He is delighted to receive readers' reactions to his articles (dmg@regressiveantidote.net), but regrets that time constraints do not always allow him to respond. His website is www.regressiveantidote.net.

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I am the Change I wish to see in the world. I prosper by guiding others to realize their Inner Divinity. I am a licensed Prayer Practitioner with the United Centers for Spiritual Living, and believe in a Universal Creative Energy that is available to all to use. I am passionate about world peace and alternative conflict resolution. I support a Dept. of Peace, as proposed by Dennis Kucinich. I am registed as Decline To State. I do not believe that war in any of its forms is relevant to solving pr...

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St JohnI am the Change I wish to see in the world. I prosper by guiding others to realize their Inner Divinity. I am a licensed Prayer Practitioner with the United Centers for Spiritual Living, and believe in a Universal Creative Energy that is available to all to use. I am passionate about world peace and alternative conflict resolution. I support a Dept. of Peace, as proposed by Dennis Kucinich. I am registed as Decline To State. I do not believe that war in any of its forms is relevant to solving pr...

to see more of bio, click on member name

I appreciate your clarity and compassion

It is truly amazing that this much of a ruckus is raised over Elliot Spitzer's "illegal" behavior with a prostitute and allegedly using some "questionable" financial machinations. As others have pointed out, the speed with which his "criminal behavior" was exposed when in most such cases it would have dragged out for months also raises some ethical questions regarding where and with whom the investigation's initiation was sourced.

 David, your ability to cut through the fluff to the heart of the matter is commendable. One wonders how much longer this will go on, as the "real" crises of the U.S. gain momentum. As the noise from the outraged minions of the right swells with disgust, the silence of the left is deafening. The din of glass shattering from the stones of the publicans is loud, and the ground treacherous to walk upon, especially in bare feet.

 Keep up your incisive commentary and know that there is a large audience aware and appreciative of your work.

I am committed to Oneness through Justice and Transformation

peace,

st john

by St John (0 articles, 0 quicklinks, 0 diaries, 3 comments) on Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 11:04:37 PM
 


I am a professional life-extensionist and liberty promoter who practices what I and husband, Paul Wakfer, encourage. More detail about both of us - philosophically and physically - at http://morelife.org/personal/

When the comment time period has closed at OpEdNews.com, readers are welcome to post their comments/questions at MoreLife Yahoo after meeting the posting requirements of that group, sent to all new members upon joining. All archived messages, however, are available to anyo...

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Kitty Antonik WakferI am a professional life-extensionist and liberty promoter who practices what I and husband, Paul Wakfer, encourage. More detail about both of us - philosophically and physically - at http://morelife.org/personal/

When the comment time period has closed at OpEdNews.com, readers are welcome to post their comments/questions at MoreLife Yahoo after meeting the posting requirements of that group, sent to all new members upon joining. All archived messages, however, are available to anyo...

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Social Preferencing is the Appropriate Action

The essence of this article boils down to one of its sentences - "If consenting adults want to do it, and no one is harmed, there is little reason to imagine why it should be outlawed or even morally suspect (raised eyebrows or the occasional whispered snicker would still be permitted, however, at least where the kinkiest stuff is concerned)."
I would modify it to be more explicit - "If the interactions are taken voluntarily by the adults involved, the only proper action by others in regard to it is to do nothing - or socially preference against or for those individuals." Negative social preferencing ("against") could take the form of "the occasional whispered snicker" or even refusing to associate with a person and encourage others to do likewise. Those who think the voluntary behavior was acceptable might be inclined to write words of praise or invite one or more of the parties to appear and speak publicly. Government has no appropriate role in this type of situation (and I would say no role at all....but that's a different subject)

The point is, individuals can and should cast their own vote, so to speak, in the arena of public opinion for or against the behavior, and even ideas, of others. And being inconsistent with one's stated views is something on which others can and should make their preferences known. This way there is influence, as opposed to the current practice of force or threat of it, directed towards the decision making by all others.

Each individual properly should decide what actions to take based on what will optimize his/her (hir) lifetime happiness and make those decisions using the widest view longest range thinking possible to hir. The acceptance or rejection by others who matter to that person - and that too like all choices is a matter of one's values - can be an extremely powerful motivator. It was greatly so in the days of small towns, but can again by use of the Internet. For more on the subject of Social Preferencing - http://selfsip.org/solutions/Social_Preferencing.html

**Kitty Antonik Wakfer

MoreLife for the rational - http://morelife.org
Reality based tools for more life in quantity and quality
Self-Sovereign Individual Project - http://selfsip.org
Self-sovereignty, rational pursuit of optimal lifetime happiness,
individual responsibility, social preferencing & social contracting

by Kitty Antonik Wakfer (22 articles, 4 quicklinks, 7 diaries, 124 comments) on Friday, March 14, 2008 at 8:10:32 PM
 

 

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