November 6, 2008 at 11:37:11

What Do Men Know About PMS? Except To Duck?

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By Martha Rosenberg (about the author) Page 2 of 2 page(s)

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Your brain is so fogged, so flatlined you think someone moved the letters on your keyboard and changed your password--but that doesn't mean you can actually sleep.

Lie down and try to get some shut eye and you snap to attention and get jumpy instead. Until you get to your keyboard.

And speaking of wide awake, PMS advice givers tell you to avoid coffee because it will make sore breasts--see: second wardrobe--worse. But what they don't tell you is how to get energy to work out--or work for that matter-- without coffee.

Then there's emotions.

Under the influence of the PMS brain, you feel so sentimental you cry at card tricks, BUT you also feel so mean you have sidewalk rage and hallway rage on top of road rage.

Actuaries know that car accidents go up during women's luteal phase but they don't know why.

Is it lack of sleep, temper or PMS' notorious lack of coordination which makes a full bottle of cranberry juice you THINK you are holding firmly fall to the floor for no apparent reason?

And the water in the bucket to mop it up spill for no reason.

And you hit the doorway frame on your way to refill it for no reason.

And speaking of dis-synchronicity, researchers also know that women who live or work together, get their periods together.

While this could have evolved for survival reason (wanna attack 6 women with PMS?) and can have an up side like cryptic conversations about the arrival of Aunt Flow and shared supplies, it has a serious down side.

Because when Mom or Sis or the female boss is annoyed with you, chances are you are annoyed with her.

Worse-- you are annoyed with her being annoyed with you.

Worse--she is annoyed with you being annoyed with her for being annoyed with you... and Doesn't Like Your Attitude.

This infinite regress of accusations and recriminations at home or work can have 51 sides-and they all relate to PMS.

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