Peeks Into the Diaries of the Candidates and Hank Paulson

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By Bernard Weiner (about the author) Page 2 of 3 page(s)

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I just hope I can keep my cool, and I hope he can't keep his, so that more ordinary Americans will be able to see what a good many Senators long ago saw in him: a dangerous, reckless, hyper-ambitious and largely ineffectual grandstander in the old style. And I just hope the voters are able to wade through the partisan slime and muck being thrown our way, and see it for what it is: last-minute desperation tactics.

INSIDE SARAH PALIN'S DIARY

I'm really scared but I've still got to put on the game face like I know what I'm doing all this 24-hours-a-day politics in Washington is way beyond me the small-time Alaskan political world I live in can't really prepare anybody certainly not me for the national and international stage but I thought I did pretty well in the debate and I was so proud of myself for getting Biden to let me use his name "Joe" since I'd been rehearsing that "say it ain't so, Joe" line for days the pundits had a field day with the fact that I didn't answer those dumb questions the moderator posed but chose to get my set of facts out there but that's OK the public won't care really they just love me for who I am "doggone it" "you betcha" i just love delivering those lines they drive the elite East Coasters crazy!

But I can't let any of my inner doubts surface i've got to keep plugging away for McCain and for myself got to resurrect my image as a strong resourceful conservative politician since McCain will be out of the picture by 2012 especially if we lose the election but he's also a really old man (one who's constantly staring at my ass, thank you very much!) and I can be the one to lead the party into a new age and back to popularity I can't wait to run next time and wipe the smirks off their faces those pointy-headed terrorist-aiding traitorous communist pinko liberals you know who they are I'm just so excited to reach lots of people who seem to love and adore me and who will follow my lead God help me I really get off on that power now if we can just somehow swim through the legal crap in Alaska the various abuse-of-power investigations into Todd and I possibily breaking the law in trying to get my sister's ex-husband fired and other officials fired because they wouldn't go along with my requests maybe some IRS problems as well maybe my "alleged" adulterous affair with Brad also if we can just keep the lid on all this until after Election Day thank you mainstream media maybe it'll all go away bring back Ronald Reagan God bless America.

INSIDE JOE BIDEN'S DIARY

I knew the minute I stepped on the primary debate stage with Barack and Hillary that I was never going to be President. So I could loosen up and be myself, and, surprise!, voters seemed to like me more that way, despite (or who knows, maybe because of) my motor-mouth gaffes. Obviously, I impressed Barack or he never would have chosen me as his running mate.

I think he's a bit wet-behind-the-ears -- compared to me, he's got the political and international experience of a gnat -- but being his Veep is the only way I'll ever get to the White House and I'm glad he chose me to sit shotgun.

God, I love politics and campaigning is such great fun. So far, the highlight of the campaign for me was "debating" Sarah Palin. I put that word in quote marks because, obviously, she didn't come there to debate ideas. She and John don't have ideas, at least none that the majority of the public agrees with or wants to hear. She came with her note-card talking points and made sure to get them all in, and simply ignored the questions posed by the moderator. And what was it with Gwen Ifill? She seemed in even more of a speed-rush than Palin, almost as if the idea of swapping ideas on a hot-button issue for five minutes would have been boring to the viewers. Damn it, that's why they tuned in!

My staff and I rehearsed and rehearsed so that I would never come across as condescending or patronizing to the moron standing opposite me. I think I carried it off, at least verbally; I couldn't help myself from broadly grinning at her more absurd locutions and positions (expand beyond Cheney's power-grab as Vice President? Did that one come out of Darth's behind?) and spin-point attacks. She's an ignorant whacko, to be sure, but she knows how to throw the elbow and the Republican base eats her up. I'd love to see her debate Ross Perot, that would be a hoot.

INSIDE HANK PAULSON'S DIARY

What a roller-coaster ride! As it turns out, we got what we wanted: the $700 billion bailout fund, but it came at quite a price. True, the potential catastrophe is real -- becoming worse by the day, with a worldwide depression not out of the realm of possibility -- but lots of economists and pundits saw the housing meltdown, credit squeeze and derivatives disaster coming long ago and yet the politicians, especially we Republicans, did nothing. They were like me, true believers in the glories of the unregulated free market, terrified that by proposing tight government regulation, we'd kill the goose that was laying all those golden eggs. We all were in a major state of denial. We knew that the economic good times were resting on flimsy foundations and eventually would come crashing down, but we didn't want to prepare for that disaster. We all hoped the catastrophe would happen on someone else's watch. Here and abroad, we movers and shakers were so comfortable, so deluded by greed, we just wanted the free ride to go on forever, so we looked away.

The consequence of waiting too long is that the whole capitalist financial system may come tumbling down on our heads, along with our social/political structure as we know it. On the other hand, when a disaster strikes, there's opportunity for massive political and economic changes that benefit those that can take advantage. (Naomi Klein in her "Shock Doctrine" book calls it "disaster capitalism," but I call it an "opportunity.") We're not even very subtle about it with this bailout. Those victimized by the various financial schemes will get little more than some trickle-down, if they're lucky. But they don't really have a viable set of leaders or way of protesting. I love this system!

Yes, we suffered an embarrassing defeat when the hot-under-the-collar Republicans in the House turned down our bill, but we turned it around four days later. However, the damage was done, not the least being that the huge fissures in the Republican party were brought to the surface, and none of our actions reflected well on our candidate and party. As a result of that and his own ineffective grandstanding, McCain is tanking steadily in the polls.

The saving grace is that when Obama takes over in January, he's going to have to deal with the two biggest messes in modern American history, courtesy of us Republicans: the Iraq quagmire and a thoroughly depressed economy. There's no way Obama can do anything more than simply tread water in that roiling ocean. Sorry, Barack. Hee, hee, hee. He won't have any money to implement his liberal reforms and initiatives, so the public will get fed up with him and the Democrat party early and return Republicans to power in 2010 in Congress and 2012 in the White House.

I don't envy Obama's Herculean tasks. And he won't be able to talk his way out of any of those messes with high-flown oratory. He's stuck in our Republican molasses. For the sake of the country, I hope he can keep the situation relatively stable and that things won't get much worse, or else the anger and hopelessness may well spill over into calls for revolution. FDR had to face many of the same problems in the 1930s, but I don't think Obama has the experience and political smarts to be another FDR.

...We've got two immediate problems to deal with in the bailout:

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Bernard Weiner, Ph.D. in government & international relations, has taught at universities in California and Washington, worked for two decades as a writer-editor at the San Francisco Chronicle, and currently serves as co-editor of The Crisis Papers (more...)

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