Fix the Debt phone-in script: I am a small business owner and my success and the jobs of my employees depend on a strong economy. (Note: The awkward language is theirs.)
Additional dialog: So please pass a bill that favors billionaires and giant corporations, while gutting the Small Business Administration and other programs that help folks like me.
I especially like that "chained CPI," which forces middle-class people into higher tax brackets and deprives them of even more money they might otherwise have spent on consumer goods. That will lower demand, making it even more unlikely that my competitors and I will be able to grow, prosper, and hire more workers.
I really hate my competitors.
A Better Life
Fix the Debt phone-in script: I am a parent and don't want to kick the can down the road for my kids' generation to deal with crippling national debt or a double dip recession. (Note: The awkward language is theirs.)
Additional dialog: So please implement the "chained CPI," which will gut their future Social Security benefits while raising their taxes throughout their working lives. I also want a plan that arbitrarily reduces Medicare benefits over time so there's nothing left by the time they get old.
My college-aged kids are graduating to record-level unemployment, too, but please don't spend any money to help with that.
Please cut education funding, too, from elementary school all the way up to Pell grants. Education's the key to advancement, and right now my kids dream of a better life than the one we had.
I really resent that.
Some Gave All
Fix the Debt phone-in script: I am a veteran, and I know that our nation's fiscal strength is a matter of national security.
Additional dialog: So please help defense contractors like the ones who did all that defective wiring and killed my friends over in Iraq.
Please be sure to implement the "chained CPI" while you're at it, too, since more than nine million of my fellow vets are on Social Security. Way I see it, they haven't sacrificed enough for their country.
Four thousand children who lost a parent in Iraq get Social Security benefits too. I know I told my buddy over there I'd look after his kids if something happened, but what the hell: maybe you folks and all your friends in Washington are right.
Maybe those kids haven't sacrificed enough either.
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