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Society's Challenge"Answering the Scandals With Personal Holiness"
As a cradle Catholic, when the clergy sex abuse scandals erupted in 2002, it hit hard. Afterall, how could so many communities of faith, all located miles apart, possibly be experiencing the same type of sex abuse problems, with similar surroundings and circumstances, always involving sex abuse by a member of the clergy or a trusted employee of a religious institution.
It is tough to accept the public allegations of clergy sex abuses and it is tougher to accept the "institutional denial" of the wrongs that have been committed against precious children and their families.
It is now evident that the Church hierarchy and its legal advisors truly believed the band-aid approach would confront the sex abuse scandals in the best interests of all the faithful; unfortunately, this is the furthest thing from the truth.
No matter what hat you wear in life, what educational degrees you may hold or what worldly wealth you may possess, the scandals hurt; sometimes to the point of wondering if it would be easier to play the ostrich and join the forces of "institutional denial."
Just think... if we could all deny the wrongs that were committed against children, as a society, we would not have to worry about protecting children in the future from sex abuses and, we would be free from accepting the horrific truths, free to live without moral accountability, free from supporting those who have been destroyed, free from worrying about the monetary losses caused by the lawsuits, free from supporting due process, justice and healing. Sounds good -- institutional denial -- but is it really what Jesus would do and is this what we want our children today to witness?
Soon after the scandals erupted, Fr. Roger Landry's "Answering the Scandals With Personal Holiness", was published in the Catholic World News on February 13, 2002. Fr. Landry's writings provided insight to answering the scandals with personal holiness and leaves the choice to each individual, to respond to the scandals privately or publicly.
This is when I started listening to the personal stories of abuse victims, that were committed against children in my community, children who also attended the same schools and churches my children attended.
Suddenly, the sex abuse allegations were not just stories, with political or defensive views of the Church hierarchy, printed in newspapers and posted on the internet.
For me, there were two survivors that initially changed my life's path after listening to their personal stories of sex abuse. It is haunting to look into their eyes and the eyes of so many survivors of abuse and their families. Afterall, these girls and boys were just like my four children who attended the same Catholic schools and churches our family attended -- and yet, not once was I warned that sexual predatory employees and priests were employed and repeatedly transferred to various parishes and schools.
Why did our family get lucky by escaping sex abuse crimes in a religious school or church community?
No reason for the so called "luck" of escaping clergy sex abuse. However, as a parent, my life experiences, faith and children are the most precious of God's gifts in this world -- do we honor the teachings of Christ by supporting all the clergy sex abuse survivors and their families in their public outcry and fight for justice?
OR
Should we be thankful no one in our family was sexually abused and then join the world of institutional denial, to save face as one of the faithful and guard our church and worldly possessions from lawsuits and policies to protect children in the future?
Are we morally free to wash our hands clean of reaching out to survivors of sex abuse, those who have suffered in shame and silence, alone and ostracized from communities of faith?
My deepest fear from the abuse scandals is that my children, who attended Catholic schools and churches most of their lives, will join the institutional denial mentality because of their strong Catholic education and background.
This is how my new-found hobby of writing letters to editors and submitting articles nationwide, gave me an opportunity to answer the clergy abuse scandals with my own personal efforts and advocacy. My family sometimes says my letters and articles are annoying -- okay with me! But amazing how soon children learn to listen to what has occurred in their churches and this is a blessing from the survivors' courage to speak out publicly, so other children will be protected.
There is still so much work to be accomplished, so many children who need guidance in answering the scandals with faith and holiness, so many of the struggling faithful who want to help but don't know what to do.
There are many private and public ways to support those who have been abused in religious and trusted communities.
It is my sincere hope that as a society, we can take responsibility for correcting the wrongs that have been committed against children, with the assistance of our country's court systems and legislation that will finally clean religious institutions of dirty secrets, while demanding policies and procedures that will protect children in the future.
Finally, it is my hope that survivors of clergy sex abuse will continue to find the courage to share personal stories of sex abuses. More importantly, we pray that Catholics and non-Catholics will read and listen to stories of sex abuses. Listen with your hearts and hopefully, as a society, we can correct the wrongs that still lay buried in files and records.
To the survivors of clergy sex abuse: You are gifts from God and "Hidden Blessings", and thanks to your courage "Our Children Deserve More" and are safer today, than yesterday.
As a society, we can make a difference for the children in the world -- please take part. God bless you.
Debby Bodkin, Founder, http://www.catholics4justice.com
Supporter, Survivors of those Abused by Priests (SNAP)
