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My heart has been enlightened since coming to the small
church I recently joined. I see life and my relationship with
God in a whole new light. The message God gave me may not
be what He gave you. I've learned to simply open my heart
and my mind to the guidance of The Holy Spirit. The last few
years have been very difficult and only by God's grace am I
even alive. It's been like living a life of bondage. Now I
understand that security in Christ can set the spirit free.
By faith I've the assurance of eternal life. Though the world
persecutes me and it seems my castles are crumbling to the
ground; Greater is He that is in me than he that is in the
world. I cannot walk in darkness for Jesus is my shining light.
When all seems cold and lonely I find warmth and sunshine
from a God of peace, love and compassion.
"Religion" is destroying people. Many people go to church
because it's the thing to do; a family tradition or to look good
in the community. But to me Christianity is not about religion.
I'm being taken to a higher level with The Father, The Son
and The Holy Spirit.
I can no longer find God's peace in a church that is not open to
the Holy Spirit. What is a real church? Is it a big beautiful
building? NO! To me, a real church is a group of believers led
and directed by the Holy Spirit; Though God's house is to be
honored and made holy, it's not about the building. A real
church has no spiritual walls, but strives daily to walk in
obedience, unity and love. Obedience is worth more than
sacrifice. A real church is built on a solid foundation. Jesus
must always be the rock of that foundation.
As I said life has been very hard. The pain is sometimes
overwhelming. Though in the eyes of the world, by solid
medical documentation and even so far as dna analysis and
human pathology, my health has been taken from me. But His
word is life to those who seek them. I keep them ever in my
heart for by the mighty stripes of Jesus we ARE healed.
Though in the physical realm of my surroundings I am
considered a prisoner of poverty. Yet there IS no lack in
Christ Jesus. I'm heiress to the greatest King that ever lived.
Finding favor with God is worth more than silver or gold.
Life's purest and greatest treasures reside within my very
being; a peace that passeth all understanding.
If I align my heart to the will of God, He will grant me my
desires. I must be saturated with the Holy Word. No matter
what happens, I will ever praise The Lord. God has a plan
especially for my life. I was created for a special mission here
on earth only I was meant to accomplish. If I leave it undone,
I will grieve Jesus. I'll no longer listen to people who try to
discourage me from achieving my hopes and dreams. Nothing
is impossible with God. He uses the weak, sick and
downtrodden to be mighty in His work. I see beyond all the
pain and adversity in my life. I will feast with Him and expect
great and mighty things, ALWAYS careful to give Him the
praise, honor and glory. For He is the focus, not us. I am but
a humble servant; a willing vessel.
I may not be important by worldly standards but I know
someone who loves me so much He gave His life for me. Had I
been the only person to ever live He would have still went to
that cross in love to defeat death. For you see, being a
Christian isn't about dying, but living. For as I was crucified
with Christ I also have been raised with Him. He is my
strength. His kingdom is at hand. I am an heiress to the King; a
royal priesthood. I stand on God's word for His promises are
true and will not return void. God cannot lie.
God comes to those who love him through "revelation". I
must be sure it is the Holy Spirit speaking to me and not a
vision or a dream I've conjured up in my mind. God will never
lead me to do anything which goes against His will. If I'm ever
in doubt about something I will pray and wait upon Him.
I've made many mistakes in my life. I've done things I wish I
could change. I may not be able to change them but I am
covered by the blood. There is no condemnation for those
who walk in Christ. Once I ask Jesus to forgive me He takes
my sins and casts them into the deepest part of the ocean,
never again to be remembered. Thus I had to realize by me
not forgiving myself I am actually insulting God. That was the
reason He went to the cross. That's why He took those lashes
across His back. He not only bore my sins; He bore my pain
and sickness. I must have faith and trust Him for He is a
mighty and awesome God. In Him there is no fear.
Never again will I get caught up in religion or simply trust
everyone who professes to be a Christian. Sadly, there are
many false phophets out there who will entice me and try to
lead me astray in the name of Jesus. I will test them. Also I
know it is okay for me to be real with God. He doesn't get
angry with me for challenging Him when I don't understand
something. He said..test me..try me...He will prove Himself
unto me.
I am going to believe in God and start believing in myself and
the abilities He gave me. If I just sit around and never act
upon what He has told me to do then I can only blame myself
for dying dreams. Even though it is hard for me to do things
sometimes, He will help me overcome theis physical pain and
go forward. I have learned to seek Him, trust Him, and never
walk in fear nor condemnation, but walk in true confidence.
Jesus is my shining light. He abides ever in my heart. He will
never leave me alone. When I feel so low even the valleys seem
to be above me, I know my Lord will lift me to where the
eagles fly. I shall soar in freedom. I do not live under the
curse. It has been broken. I am free because of Calvary, the
cross and the suffering Christ went through. I cannot even
imagine the pain He bore. He would have died that day just
for me alone yet he took on the sins of the whole world. He
shed every drop of His precious blood for me and for us all.
When the Father raised Him from the dead the victory was won.
Also I've learned in the last year or so to turn over those I
care so much about to God. I have family and friends I used to
worry about. But I realize I cannot save anyone. Only God
can do that. Yet the fervent prayers of the righteous reach
the Father. They make it into the Throne Room of grace.
Now safe in the hands of God and my prayers have power.
Also I've learned forgiveness. The past year has been very
hurtful. There are some I treasured as friends and
respected as persons. My heart has always been genuinely
concerned about them. Not just a "concerned citizen", but a
caring friend. I know Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy.
These few people have deliberately tried to inflict even more
pain into our lives; It caused many tears on top of tears. I
can honestly say, I have no malice toward anyone on this
earth. I pray every night for both friend and foe and I truly
mean it when I ask blessings into their lives.
As far as anyone having Jesus come into their hearts, I can try
to be an example of God's love but only the Spirit can have a
deal with them. Humans are not robots,
but we all have a free will. God wants us to accept him and love
him freely.
I thank God for every sunrise and every sun that sinks into the
horizon. I humbly thank Him for each breath he gives me. I
am His child and I will serve him forever. Though at times, I
feel like Brother Job is reliving in me I will never curse my
God. I love Him and my greatest desire is to uplift His name
and to be His glory. I do ask for prayer from all who believe
in the power of God. Both my husband and I are fighting to
survive this horrendous illness and be a voice and help to
others. We see ourselves in the spiritual realm as whole,
healthy, loving, caring, harmonious, strong, prosperous and a
shining light to others.
I am so glad I was directed to the little church I now attend.
What may be small in number is strong in Spirit and truly a
place to meet God. A receptive heart and The Holy Spirit has
made me a stronger person in Christ Jesus. I know how to
study his word and actually meditate upon it. I'm amazed at
all I've learned since I began to thirst for knowledge. God has
given me springs of living water and He is going to use me in a
mighty way for His glory. Praise The Lord!
