Death Of A Proud Bowler by Kevin Tully
The tragic story of the last twenty-four hours of the life of Larry Fromme, father of two, devoted husband, roofing contractor, Methodist, fan of Government Mule and Derek Trucks, volunteer firefighter and scratch bowler. Larry was shot and killed by his neighbor, Carter Balfour, a divorced electronics salesman and Sergeant At Arms of the local Tea Party chapter as he was trying to, mistakenly, open Mr. Balfour's side gate.
Larry had celebrated his team's bowling victory a little too aggressively and was quite drunk when he was dropped off at his house, around eleven-thirty p.m., by a team member. He apparently mistook Mr. Balfour's gate for his own. Mr. Balfour claims he heard a commotion on the side of his house, grabbed his assault rifle and upon reaching the site of the noise, "I could only see this rather large individual, who appeared to be wearing a turban, trying to break into my back yard -- he also had a large bag with him, I thought it was a bomb. I shot him, I shot Larry three times. We've been warned about some Muslims moving into the neighborhood...oh, God I shot Larry. We've been fishing together." Said Mr. Balfour.
This was a tragic case of
mistaken identity. Larry, when
discovered by local police, slumped over Mr. Balfour's garden hose reel, was
carrying his bowling ball bag and had his underwear on his head.