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Butter for Guns, or How to Save the World

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opednews.com

Around my campfire, we developed a plan to save the world from nuclear destruction. In the event the reader wants to survive beyond the next few months, he might read this.

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There is a fundamental disagreement between the Palestinians and me. They want us to open the borders, so the UN can ship enormous free food amounts to the Hamas. They will sell it at high prices to their people, thus ensuring tidy profits with which they can buy advanced Iranian missiles. These will put more cities in range to kill Jews more effectively.

Then, Hamas will insist on the release of hundreds of terrorists [in exchange for Gilad Shalit] many of whom have Jewish blood on their hands. They intend to infiltrate back into Israel to stage more attacks. The western and UN Jew-haters will threaten us with sanctions if we move against terrorists on their home ground.

The global economic meltdown may encourage nuclear powers such as Pakistan, the Ukraine or North Korea to sell a few weapons on the world market. Four would suffice to take out Israel.

Many people don't realize this move would end the world. I won't trouble the reader with the mechanics of it. Since nobody could stop the process anyway, there is little reason to describe it in gruesome detail.

Eventually, everything must end and the middle of a Great Depression might be ideal for the big countdown. My sole objection is that it is bad form to end the world for such petty and useless folks as the Palestinians. Let the best and the brightest ruin everything. Already, they have run us into the ground.

Here's my plan.

The Hamas must release Gilad Shalit, or we reduce food shipments to an amount barely able to sustain life. If Hamas buys a single weapon, the food stops altogether.

After their food stocks vanish, we begin to trade butter for guns.

 

Born a month before Pearl Harbor, I attended world events from an early age. My first words included Mussolini, Patton, Sahara and Patton. At age three I was a regular listener to Lowell Thomas. My mom was an industrial nurse a member of the (more...)
 

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We here in the US by Mark Sashine on Wednesday, Feb 18, 2009 at 5:59:35 PM
Where is the Malice in Trading Butter for Guns? by Jason Paz on Wednesday, Feb 18, 2009 at 7:04:39 PM
I modeled my answer by your logic by Mark Sashine on Wednesday, Feb 18, 2009 at 7:36:01 PM
What have the Nigerians to Teach in My Neighborhood? by Jason Paz on Wednesday, Feb 18, 2009 at 8:14:48 PM
Nigerians will teach you by Mark Sashine on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 8:31:53 AM
The USA Has no Business in Asia Especially in Jerusalem by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 10:54:40 AM
Jason by Mark Sashine on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 12:32:04 PM
Naw, We are a Rabble Impossible to Lead by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 4:46:11 PM
also popularly known as feeble-mindedness by ariadna theokopoulos on Saturday, Feb 21, 2009 at 12:50:39 AM
Feeble Mindedness by Jason Paz on Saturday, Feb 21, 2009 at 3:52:15 AM
Here is the problem as I see it, by Stanimal on Wednesday, Feb 18, 2009 at 11:32:01 PM
The Separation of Church and State in the USA is One of the by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 5:42:24 AM
The Middle East Problem by wagelaborer on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 11:17:13 AM
Sitting on the Fence Can Present a Clearer View by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 11:47:28 AM
Jason... by mikel paul on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 1:41:59 PM
Mikel... by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 4:27:01 PM
You didn't get my point Jason, by Stanimal on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 8:28:25 PM
We Win and Survive and Many Folks Resent That by Jason Paz on Thursday, Feb 19, 2009 at 11:45:12 PM